Trial and Error
by PottersLily
Summary: 'Evans,' he grinned 'you're staring.' 'No I'm not.' she replied crossly. 'Trust me, after years of girls falling all over me for my charm and good looks; I know a stare when I see one.' LE/JP romance, gets darker, basically a huge pre-potter headcanon.
1. A Good Student

****A/N** Hey guys, this is my first long fanfic and I'm really excited to see how it'll turn out! I hope you all like it! I'll update as often as possible if the story is popular.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own any of the ideas or themes in this story - that's all J.K. Rowling.**

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Chapter 1 – A Good Student

It was past midnight and the fire in the Gryffindor common room still glowed weakly, the grey ash was littered with red coals which were the only source of heat. The room was almost silent – completely deserted except for the hunched figure of a student and the gentle scratch of a quill.

Lily's eyes burned from fatigue as the quill in her hand dropped onto the desk in front of her. She felt her shoulders sag and her head roll towards her chest but she denied herself the luxury of scrunching up into a ball and succumbing to sleep. _'Just a few more hours,' _she thought _'a few more hours and I can curl up in my nice warm bed. Maybe I'll ask the house elves to bring me up some cocoa.' _She picked up her quill. _'It's all bloody McGonagall's fault,' _she dropped her quill again. _'What kind of sadist sets 6 rolls of parchment on the theoretical transfiguration of goats?'_

She leaned over, resting her forehead on the desk. _'I'll just close my eyes for a few seconds,' _she thought.

'Evans! Oh Evaaaans' Lily liked the sound of that voice. It was warm and mellow, kind of sweet but also gruff at the same time; the voice was melodic and smooth yet she knew it could be gravelly and even grating when it was angry or stressed. It seemed strange, really, that she should know so much about how the voice felt from the slightest change in tone… 'Evans, as delightful as you look with your nose covered in ink I must inform you that your 5 page essay (five pages, Evans, seriously?) looks decidedly less delightful when it's illegible'

Lily jerked upright. Sure enough she had somehow managed to upset a bottle of ink all over her Transfiguration essay. 'Shit… Shit! This took me ages! Oh God, it's ruined, you can't read anything, I'm going to have to start all over again!' She started frantically dabbing at the sodden role of parchment, desperately trying to salvage the masterpiece (and it had been a masterpiece) that she had just spent the last four hours of her life completing. Whirling around to grab her wand, Lily managed to knock three heavy textbooks and yet another ink bottle flying off the table, narrowly avoiding smashing into a very amused James Potter.

'Evans,' he laughed, grabbing her by the upper arms and turning her to face him 'maybe you should calm down.'

'Potter this bloody essay took me longer than all of the work you've ever done in your life!' she growled.

He raised his eyebrows, 'ouch, I was going to offer to help you out but maybe I should just leave you to it.' His grip on her arms did not loosen.

'I'm sorry,' she sighed 'I shouldn't have said that.'

He grinned. 'It's alright Evans; you know I can't stay mad at you when you've got your sleepy head on.' Lily suddenly became very aware of the fact that she looked a mess; a bright red halo of bed-hair surrounded her face, flattened slightly on one side from the desk, and she was pretty sure that she was covered in ink. She blushed slightly and looked down, not before catching James' smirk. Grabbing his wand, James quickly set right the mess on the desk, vanishing the spilled ink and sending the books soaring into a neat pile back on the table. Now only the soiled paper was left over. James picked it up gingerly, 'I hate to be the one to break it to you, Evans, but I don't think you're gonna be able to save this with a scouring charm.' He let it drop back onto the desk.

'Well that's my perfect record down the drain then,' Lily sighed, flopping back into the armchair too tired to really care.

'McGonagall will give you time to fix it…' he replied, sitting down next to her.

There was an awkward silence. Lily looked over at James, studying him discreetly. He was tall and slim in that way that teenage boys always are. His perpetually messy hair seemed even more unruly tonight, as if he had been constantly running his fingers through it; he smelled nice too, kind of musky but there was also the hint of something clean like… peppermint? Pine?

'Evans,' he grinned 'you're staring.'

'No I'm not.' She replied crossly.

'Trust me, after years of girls falling all over me for my charm and good looks; I know a stare when I see one.'

'You're so full of it, Potter.'

'You love it, Evans.'

It was always like this between them: snappy one-liners from Lily and extravagant (and somewhat narcissistic) exclamations from James. Lily often acted like she hated him, and sometimes she did; he always had to be the loudest and the wittiest, he got laughs from playing on other people's insecurities and, honestly, he was downright cruel sometimes. She thought back to the day that James had hung Severus upside-down by his ankles and thrown hexes at him in front of everyone. Of course, Sev hadn't been entirely innocent; that was the day he had called her a mudblood and she'd never forgotten it, she never would.

James had thought he was protecting her that day. She didn't know how to tell him that she didn't _need _protecting; she was just as strong as him, she just didn't need to go around cursing people to prove it. He was trying to be kind, though, in his own weird way. She saw that kindness in him sometimes; when he thought no-one was looking. Once in a while he would drop his guard, the act would fall away and Lily could see him for what he was; when he was laughing with Sirius, or getting Peter Pettigrew out of one of those tight spots he always managed to squeeze himself into. She'd sometimes see him hunched over in an armchair in the corner of the common room, immersed in a good book; his normally perfectly messy hair hanging low over his face, hiding him away. He seemed so young to her, vulnerable even. That was the James Potter she liked, the one who didn't need to be anything or anyone other than himself.

'Lily,' James broke her out of her stupor, 'you haven't said anything for the last few minutes, are you alright?' he asked uncertainly.

'What? Yeah sorry I'm just tired,' she mumbled 'kind of dreading facing McGonagall tomorrow…'

'You'll be fine, Evans! Merlin only knows the last time Sirius handed in his transfiguration homework on time. There was this one time, Sirius and I –' he stopped abruptly.

'What?' Lily felt her eyes slip shut; she enjoyed just listening to him speak.

'It's nothing… I mean it wasn't nothing – it's not nothing, I just – I didn't get up in the middle of the night to talk to you about Sirius'

'_His voice really is like a lullaby' _Lily thought tiredly.

James cleared his throat, 'I actually wanted to ask you –'

'Ask me…' she repeated dreamily.

'The Yule Ball is in a few weeks and I-' he seemed to choke.

'A few weeks.'

'I know the last time I asked you out you told me to shove my wand somewhere that sounds pretty painful and potentially anatomically impossible but I thought it was worth another shot. So, what I'm really trying to say is – _Evans are you asleep?'_

'Not sleep' she mumbled.

'Evans, I was just about to _pour my heart out to you _and you're bloody sleeping!'

She didn't respond.

* * *

Sighing, James stood up and looked down at her. Lily's face was relaxed and her breathing was even. He smiled slightly in spite of himself and grabbed a blanket from a nearby armchair. Carefully, he covered Lily with it and smoothed her hair off her face. _'Next time, Potter,' _he thought to himself as he crossed the room to the stairs to his dormitory. Just as he was about to climb up, he heard her voice.

'James,' she sighed without opening her eyes.

He turned to face her slightly, 'yeah?'

'You called me Lily.'


	2. A Rude Awakening

****AUTHOR'S NOTE****

**Hey guys,**

**I realise that not much really happens in this chapter, so sorry about that. I kind of had to use this one as a filler because it builds up to some bigger stuff that's going to happen later on.**

**Don't worry, I promise it'll get more exciting soon.**

**P.S. Thanks so much to everyone who's reviewed/followed, it means the world to me**

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Chapter 2 – A Rude Awakening

Lily lay with her eyes closed; curled awkwardly into the hunched ball she had slept in all night. Her head ached incessantly and her neck was definitely cricked. Altogether she felt like she had been trampled by a hoard of rabid hippogriffs. Not good.

Her eyes slowly flickered open and she sat up, rubbing her face. Looking around, Lily realised that she had fallen asleep curled on an armchair by the fireplace – no wonder she felt like a steaming pile of dragon crap. She sighed in irritation, realising there was no way she was going to fall back to sleep now. The common room was quiet; there were no students tiredly trudging down to the great hall for breakfast or frantically searching for a missing sock or generally just getting ready for the morning's lessons. In fact, it was almost _too _quiet. Lily unwillingly stood up and stretched her sore muscles, letting the blanket covering her drop to the floor. It was only then that she caught sight of the clock.

_'Shit,' _Lily thought, _'shit, bollocks, cock!'_ The clock read 9:15 – lessons had started fifteen minutes ago.

Lily hurtled up to her dormitory, throwing on the cleanest set of robes she could find while simultaneously trying to brush her teeth and hair. She gave up trying to tame the wild bird's nest on her head and scraped it all back into a bun, without even bothering to attempt putting on makeup. Dashing back downstairs to the common room, she grabbed all of her textbooks and dumped them unceremoniously into her bag along with a few quills and some parchment. Suddenly she noticed her transfiguration paper. It was completely ruined, covered in ink without one legible word. Lily groaned inwardly but had no choice but to abandon the once-incredible essay and rush down to her first lesson.

As she dashed down the stairs, Lily caught sight of herself in a mirror and immediately wished she hadn't. Her skin was pasty and there were huge bruised-looking bags under her eyes – she could just tell that today was going to be a disaster.

* * *

James had seated himself in his usual seat at the back of the classroom next to Sirius and behind Evans. Well, he should have been behind Evans except for the fact her vibrant red hair (as well as the rest of her) was conspicuously missing.

'Has anyone seen Miss Evans?' Professor McGonagall asked 'It's not like her to be late.'

'She's probably off snogging Snivellus somewhere.' Sirius joked quietly. James dug him painfully in the ribs with his elbow. Sirius just barked a laugh. 'Don't worry mate, I reckon you could take him'

'What was that, Mr Black?' McGonagall snapped sharply.

'Nothing Professor,' said Sirius seriously. 'Just telling James how much I liked your new hat. Where's it from? Wait don't tell me… Madam Malkin's I bet – finest hat maker I ever saw.'

McGonagall raised her eyebrows coolly, 'I transfigured it from a raven actually, Mr Black, which is what you'll all be learning to do today.'

'Oh I dunno, Professor, it sounds a little bit cruel for my taste.'

'I'm sure you'll get over it.' She snapped. 'In fact, why don't you come up here and show us all how it's done.'

'I don't think I'm really –'

'NOW' she barked.

Sirius got up hastily and pulled out his wand. He made a great show of clearing his throat. Just as he was about to utter the spell, however, the classroom door burst open revealing a very breathless Lily Evans.

'I'm so sorry I'm late, Professor,' Lily spluttered 'I, er, got caught up.'

'Sit down, Miss Evans,' McGonagall replied curtly 'we shall discuss this later. Ten points from Gryffindor.'

Evans blushed even redder and slipped quietly into her seat. James watched as she hastily pulled out her books and quill; she was breathing heavily, like she'd run all the way there. She also looked tired, James noted, her hair was in a messy bun on top of her head and there were dark circles under her eyes. In James' opinion she still looked bloody good. Her pale skin was flushed, cheeks pink, and her lips looked quite red, like she had been biting them. That was a nervous habit she had, actually; James always knew when Evans was stressed by the way she chewed delicately on her lips.

Leaning over, James whispered 'Evans! Oi, Evans!'

'What?' she replied, turning to face him with a sigh.

'I like your hair like that,' he grinned 'you should put it up more often.'

She just rolled her eyes and turned back around.

* * *

Lily massaged her neck as she watched Sirius Black make a complete prat out of himself trying to turn a raven into a hat. He was really very intelligent; perfectly capable of simple transfiguration like this, but for some reason he didn't seem to want anyone to know just how good he was. Lily watched as he 'accidentally' engorged the raven to the size of a young dragon and sent it flying off, knocking Evan Rosier's hat right off his head. Professor McGonagall, amidst gales of laughter from the rest of the class, yelled sharply at Black, deducting a further ten points from Gryffindor.

Lily felt someone tap her on the shoulder. She turned around.

'Evans,' James tried again, smirking at her.

'What is it Potter? And don't say anything about my hair; I already know I look a mess.'

'Evans please give me some credit; I wasn't going to say anything about your hair. The crazy look works for you.' Outrageously, he winked.

Lily scowled at him, 'wow, thanks Potter.' She said sarcastically.

'That's okay, Evans;' he grinned 'I can think of a way you can repay me for the favour.'

'I-'

'What I'm asking, Evans – I mean, what I'm really trying to say is…' James suddenly looked flustered; a blush had crept up his neck slightly. 'Evans – Lily – I wanted to know if you'd like to-'

Just then Black flopped back into his seat next to James, grinning smugly.

'Sorry Lily,' he smiled unapologetically 'I'm going to have to steal our dashing young James away from you for a moment, there's something we need to discuss.'

'Fine by me.' Lily said shortly at the same time James said 'We're having a conversation.'

James looked hurt and glanced at Lily somewhat reproachfully. Lily surprised herself by feeling a pang of guilt at the wounded expression on his face.

'Sorry Prongs,' Sirius replied casually 'but we have to talk about Moony and his _fluffy little problem.'_

'What, does he own a badly behaved rabbit or something?' Lily snorted.

James' face grew guarded. 'Something like that.'

Lily raised her eyebrows slightly but turned back to face the front where, upon attempting to turn her hat back into a bird, Rosia Patil had managed to somehow set it on fire. However, Lily could still hear snatches of Sirius and James' conversation, which had taken a very interesting turn.

'…can't expect him to stay cooped up in that shack.' Lily heard Sirius say.

'It's too dangerous… hurt someone.' James replied.

The two boys were talking in hushed tones but Lily managed to make out just two more words: 'full moon'.

Just as Lily was about to turn around and question James on his interest with the full moon, Professor McGonagall cleared her throat and the class fell silent.

'I am _very _disappointed with this class today,' she said grimly. 'I expected better from students of your age group. You should all be setting an example for the younger students in the school, not acting like a babbling, bumbling band of baboons! I certainly hope that you have _all _remembered your essays on the theoretical transfiguration of goats; I would not like to be the person who neglected to complete theirs. However, I am sure that at least one of you decided that he or she had something better to do; please raise your hand if you have _not _completed the task set.'

Sure enough, only one person in the class raised their hand.

* * *

Evans' hand quivered slightly as she held it in the air. Everyone looked over at her, pity etched into their faces – no-one wanted to feel the wrath of McGonagall. Sure enough, the middle-aged witch's nostrils flared alarmingly – a dangerous sign.

'Miss Evans, first of all you stroll into my classroom twenty _three_ minutes late and _then _you neglect to even present your homework to me. Do you think you are above the rules of the school?

'I'm sorry, Professor, I tried-'

'_Tried _isn't good enough if nothing gets done, Miss Evans.'

Evans flushed deep red at this. James felt a rush of irritation; did McGonagall really not see how bloody exhausted Evans looked? He opened his mouth to say something but felt a grip on his arm. He looked away from Evans to look at Sirius.

'Leave it Prongs,' Padfoot warned 'you don't need to get in shit with McGonagall so close to the full moon.'

James rolled his eyes but said nothing as the Professor laid into Evans. By the time the lecture was finished, Evans had lost a further 20 points from Gryffindor and gained a detention as well. Despite McGonagall's harsh words, the punishment could have been a lot worse. Indeed, the elder witch was watching the younger with a slightly concerned expression on her face.

When the lesson ended, Evans began to pack up her things slowly. James moved forward to stand in front of her.

'You alright, Evans?' He asked 'McGonagall can be a right bitch sometimes.'

She glared at him, 'I'm fine, Potter. I think I can handle one little detention without freaking out.'

'You seemed a little freaked out about it last night,' he said innocently.

'Last night I'd just spent four hours writing the bloody essay.'

He grinned at that, 'Yeah I remember, you've still got that little splotch of ink on your nose by the way.'

Evans' hand went up to her face instinctively but then dropped back down to her side at the look on James' face.

'Don't worry Evans,' he continued, 'you don't need to make an effort with me. I like a girl who doesn't worry too much about how she looks.'

'You like any girl within a five mile radius.' She retorted.

'Nah,' he dismissed with a smile, 'you're the only girl for me, Evans.'

* * *

Lily just rolled her eyes as she watched James swagger confidently away from her, laughing loudly with Black. Remus Lupin came up just behind them, tucking away a book into his bag. Last was Peter Pettigrew, scurrying to catch up with his best friends.

Lily couldn't help but watch them go; it was only afterwards, when she was trudging across the snowy grounds to Herbology, that she remembered the question she had wanted to pose to James. Why exactly was he so interested in the full moon?


	3. A Rather Unfortunate Snowball

****AN** Hey guys, so this chapter obviously contains a lot more action than the last. I'll be posting the next Chapter (which is really a continuation of this one) really very soon so you'll all find out the outcome of the events soon. Thanks again to everyone who has read and reviewed!**

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Chapter 3 – A Rather Unfortunate Snowball

Lily sped across the grounds, shivering. There had been no time to grab a warm cloak that morning and, sure enough, it had begun to snow profusely as she made her way to greenhouse three for Herbology. As the weather worsened, Lily dipped her head and ploughed through the fast-setting snow as quickly as she could without looking up. Her stomach grumbled and she thought longingly about the breakfast she had missed that morning. _'I'd kill for a slice of bacon,' _she thought miserably, _'or a bowl of porridge with honey and-' _Her thoughts were cut short as she smashed straight into something huge, brown and very solid.

Lily felt the ground slip from under her and she fell backwards gracelessly. Quickly, a huge moleskin covered hand reached out and grabbed her by the elbow, stopping her from landing in a crumpled heap in the snow. Looking up, Lily recognised the huge, friendly face of Rubeus Hagrid – the assistant groundskeeper of Hogwarts. His whole face was covered in a thick black beard, but she could see his kind beetle-black eyes looking down at her in concern.

'Sorry 'bout that' he smiled, pulling her upright with his dustbin lid-sized hands. 'Didn't see yeh down there.'

Lily grinned. Most people were scared of the gigantic gamekeeper's assistant – with good reason. Hagrid was twice as tall as most of the students at Hogwarts and at least three times as wide. However, in reality Lily knew that he would never harm a fly – his gigantic shape was filled with a huge heart.

'That's alright, Hagrid,' she laughed, 'how are you?'

'Oh, I'm alrigh' Lily, I've been growin' all the sprouts for the school's Christmas dinner.' He puffed his chest out proudly, 'Dumbledore reckons I can handle it meself this year.'

'Oh really?'

'You bet. Great man, Dumbledore, great man! Anyway, I bes' be off – lots to do! Why don't yeh come over for tea this Friday? Tell me all about how things are goin' down at the school.'

Lily laughed again, 'I'd love to.' She replied.

Hagrid smiled before trudging off through the snow, knocking students aside with a wave of one huge gloved hand.

Lily moved on, feeling slightly better than she had before after her conversation with the gentle giant. She rushed into Herbology, shaking flecks of snow from her auburn hair.

Lily barely had time to think for the rest of the lesson; they were repotting Venomous Tentacula – a dangerous job that required a lot of concentration.

* * *

When the lesson finished, Lily once again trudged out into the snowy grounds of Hogwarts. The blizzard was really coming down now and Lily pulled her robes more tightly around herself as she made her way up to the castle, where she usually met her friends.

Suddenly, a snowball came flying out of no-where and her squarely in the back of the head, knocking her forwards onto the ground. Standing up and whirling around, Lily came face to face with Joshua Wilkes, an ugly seventh year Slytherin boy.

'Watch it, mudblood,' he sneered, pushing Lily backwards as she tried to regain her footing.

Lily pulled out her wand furiously and pointed it at Wilkes. 'Back the fuck off Wilkes,' she warned angrily.

'Why? What're you gonna do, exactly?' he replied.

'I'll hex your face off, how about that?'

'Now, now Evans,' came a cool voice from behind them, 'one shouldn't make promises that one can't keep.'

Whipping around, Lily caught sight of Lucius Malfoy, another seventh year prefect. Behind him came Bellatrix Black, Evan Rosier and, trailing behind them, Severus.

Bellatrix stared at Lily through hooded eyes. 'Look at the filthy mudblood,' she cackled, 'standing there holding out her wand like it'll do her any good. Can you even do magic, mudblood? I bet you're not even a real witch.'

'Shall we find out?' grinned Wilkes, raising his wand.

Malfoy raised his eyebrows. 'Five against one? That hardly seems fair Joshua.' But he was smiling.

Lily raised her wand again pointing it straight at Malfoy's face. No-one moved for a moment, all eyes were on Lily – waiting for her to make the first move. Her eyes roamed over the group, taking them in, wondering how many of the gits she could hit before someone cursed her. Malfoy looked calm but she knew he was all talk – too much of a coward to really do anything when it came down to it. However, there was a manic glint in Bellatrix's eyes that Lily didn't like very much; that girl had always been unstable.

Finally, Lily's eyes came to rest on Severus. He was the only one who had not yet taken out his wand. His long hair flopped over his eyes and his expression was one of uncertainty – fear. He looked up suddenly and met Lily's eyes. She raised her eyebrows, phrasing the question that was on her mind: _'are you going to let this happen?' _Sev held her gaze for a second more but then his eyes dropped; he slunk back into the group. Lily felt her lip curl. _Fine. _

'Go on then, mudblood.' Bellatrix taunted.

Lily seemed to falter. Her wand arm lowered slightly and she sighed.

Bellatrix wore a triumphant smile. 'Just as I expected, the mudblood can't even perform a single curse.'

Suddenly a blast of light erupted from the end of Lily's wand. '_Flipendo!' _she screamed. Bellatrix was thrown backwards with the force of the jinx, landing in a crumpled heap on the floor.

Lily smiled grimly but her victory was short-lived. From all around her came the sounds of various Slytherin hexes being thrown. She ducked quickly to avoid the spells and then fired off a few more curses, allowing herself a self-satisfied laugh as she caught Rosier full in the face with a bat-bogey hex. Looking up, she saw that Wilkes had attempted a conjunctivitis curse but had missed and hit Malfoy who was now jumping around clutching his face in agony. _'Two down, three to go.' _Lily thought grimly.

She stood up, raising her wand again as she moved towards where Bellatrix was beginning to get to her feet. However, before she could utter a single word, someone grabbed her from behind and held her arms behind her back. Lily's wand clattered to the ground.

Craning her neck, Lily saw that it was Wilkes who had snuck up behind her.

_'Fucking spectacular.' _She thought bitterly.

Bellatrix rose to her feet unsteadily, collecting her own wand from the ground as she went. Her eyes burned with anger as she stalked over to where Lily struggled against Wilkes' hold.

'The little mudblood knows how to play!' She shrieked hysterically.

Lily spat at her.

'You bitch!' Bellatrix screeched, flourishing her wand ready to attack.

'Stop.' Severus' quiet voice pierced the momentary silence.

Bellatrix's head snapped round to where Sev was standing, half-hidden, on the side-lines of the fight.

'Stop?' her voice echoed dangerously.

Lily watched as Sev moved forwards into plain view, stepping swiftly in front of Bellatrix's wand arm.

'Yes, stop.'

'And why should I do that?'

Severus turned his head slightly to give Lily a fleeting glance. He looked forlorn, his black hair sprinkled with snow, his pasty skin looking even paler than normal. He seemed to steel himself.

'She – the mudblood – she isn't worth you getting in trouble, Bella.'

Bellatrix raised her eyebrows slightly. 'Do I look like I care about getting in trouble?'

'You don't want to get expelled-'

_'You don't want to get expelled.' _She mimicked cruelly. 'Don't worry, Severus, I don't intend to kill her. No, I'm just going to teach the bitch a little lesson.'

'Wha-' Severus began, but before he could finish his question, Bellatrix swept him out of the way with her arm and raised her wand a final time, grinning nastily.

_'Crucio' _Bellatrix yelled and the world seemed to explode.


	4. To Start a War

****A/N** Hey guys, we're already at Chapter 4, I can't believe it! This is another action-filled chapter with more Jily than the last. It leads on to some bigger stuff as well. Thank you to everyone who's stuck with the story so far, I hope I'm not disappointing anyone!**

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Chapter 4 – To Start a War

James and Remus wandered out of the greenhouses five minutes after everyone else had already left; Professor Sprout had held them at trowel-point, forcing them to help her clear up every last speck of soil from the workbenches.

'We don't want the mandrakes getting twitchy over it,' she had warned dangerously 'they're already turning surly, and you know what they're like.'

James did not tell her that he wasn't particularly interested in the behavioural patterns of mandrakes.

Remus rushed ahead slightly, his head bowed against the swirling snow. James caught up with him quickly, 'you alright Moony?' he asked, 'you seem a little bit on edge.'

Remus sighed, 'yeah I'm fine, it's just-'

'Just what?'

'I can feel the full moon creeping up.'

James felt a rush of sympathy for his best friend. Quite honestly, Remus looked like utter shit. He was pale and unshaven; he hadn't bothered to cut his hair in the last few weeks and it was beginning to look unkempt. This combined with his patched, second-hand clothes (Remus' family wasn't the richest) and the small scars that littered his skin, Remus could almost have been mistaken for a younger Mundungus Fletcher.

Moony always began to look like this as the full moon drew nearer. His condition took its toll.

'We'll all be there-' James began to say but Remus cut him off.

'What's going on over there?'

James followed Remus' gaze to where a large group was forming; they all seemed to be watching something, shouting their disapproval.

James raised his eyebrows, 'dunno, mate. Let's go find out.'

* * *

Lily jolted her leg upwards as hard as she could, slamming her foot into Wilkes' unprotected groin. With a shriek of agony, he released her and she fell to the floor just in time to avoid the curse that Bellatrix had just aimed her way.

Lily felt fury course through her whole body as she grabbed her wand and straightened up. She was vaguely aware of a large group forming around the two of them. Bellatrix danced backwards slightly; she seemed shocked at her own nerve, like she couldn't believe that she had used the unforgivable curse on another person. Lily had no doubt that the bitch had used it before – probably on harmless puppy dogs. However, this time the spell had simply hit the castle wall, metres away from where Bellatrix had been aiming – Lily's face.

'Looks like you could use some target practice, bitch.' Lily spat, holding her wand out in front of her.

'I'll bear that in mind, mudblood.' Bellatrix snarled in reply.

The two girls wasted no time. _'Stupefy!' _Lily screamed at the same moment Bella cried _'Crucio!' _once more.

The spells collided in mid-air.

* * *

The yelling got much louder as James and Remus approached the group. James could barely see anything over the heads of the many students who had crowded round in a circle. Remus tapped James on the shoulder and pointed wordlessly to the castle doors. He turned round just in time to see Sirius burst through them, Peter at his heels.

James grabbed his best friend by the shoulder. 'Padfoot, what the hell is going on?'

'Fight.' Sirius explained shortly, as they wrestled their way through the crowd of spectators. 'Wormtail and I saw it through the windows upstairs.'

'Excellent,' James grinned but, seeing the look on Sirius' face, his smile died quickly. 'Who is it?'

'My wannabe death eater cousin Bellatrix and-'

But James didn't need to hear the rest of that sentence. They had finally fought their way to the front of the group and had a clear view of exactly what was happening. James watched dumbfounded as the two girls in front of him battled ferociously, their wands flashing like sabres.

_'Evans?' _James yelled incredulously as the redhead whirled around and aimed a well-placed curse at Bellatrix's chest. Unfortunately, the crazed Slytherin deflected the spell easily and sent a counter curse flying back almost a second later.

Evans was an impressive fighter. She had a unique style; where most wizards would use their wands to protect them, Evans would use her body. She would duck and twist, allowing jinxes to fly harmlessly past her while sending another three shooting out of the end of her wand. Bellatrix's spells could never quite seem to catch her (a fact that seemed to infuriate the bitch). In short, she fought like a wizard and defended herself like a muggle.

James was pleased to see that Evans had already taken out Wilkes, who had fallen to the ground in a crumpled heap clutching his balls. He grinned; she'd kicked the bugger where it hurt. However, Rosier seemed to have recovered from whatever Evans had hit him with and had begun advancing towards the two witches murderously.

James sighed. _'The things I do for love.' _He thought, drawing his wand from his robes.

* * *

Lily was beginning to tire. Bellatrix was a strong witch; she knew more spells than Lily and was much more ruthless in her attacks. However, Lily was angrier.

_'I'm tired of being called a mublood!' _She thought.

She threw a jinx at Bellatrix

_'I'm tired of them thinking they're better than me!'_

A hex.

_'I'm tired of constantly having to prove I'm worth something!'_

A curse.

The final spell hit Bellatrix in the face and gouged a deep mark into one of her high cheekbones but she barely seemed to notice. Lily ducked low and, out of the corner of her eye, saw Rosier straighten up. He raised his wand. Lily knew then that she was going to lose.

Suddenly a flash of light erupted from behind Lily and Rosier fell to the floor, his limbs locked in a full body-bind curse. James appeared instantly beside her, firing spells at the Slytherins.

'Alright Evans.' He grinned.

She laughed disbelievingly.

However, her laughter was short lived. Taking advantage of her momentary lack of concentration, Bellatrix sent a hex flying through Lily's arms, hitting her squarely in the chest.

* * *

James yelled out as Evans' feet were lifted from the floor; she flew backwards alarmingly fast, smashing into the castle wall before falling to the ground motionless.

Whipping round, James saw that Sirius was already beside him, duelling fiercely with Bellatrix. Remus was working on binding a dazed Wilkes to a still recumbent Rosier and Peter was… cowering.

'Best friends with mudbloods and blood traitor scum are we now, Sirius?' Bellatrix shrieked. 'If you mix with the scum, don't expect to turn out any better than them!'

'I'd rather stick with them than you and your death eater pals, Bella!' Sirius retorted angrily.

'Is that meant to offend me?' she replied incredulously 'I'd be honoured to call myself one of them, and so should-'

'Shut up!' Sirius roared, brandishing his wand furiously.

'What are you gonna do, Sirius? You don't have the-'

'STOP THIS NONSENSE AT ONCE!' a booming voice swept towards them, seeming to silence even the howling wind.

The tall, slender figure of Albus Dumbledore advanced towards them. He carved a path through the students, who scurried out of his way as fast as they could. Behind him came Professor McGonagall, looking absolutely livid, and the tiny figure of the young Professor Flitwick.

Sirius quickly dropped his wand but Bella kept hers out, pointed straight at her cousin.

'Put your wand away immediately, Miss Black!' Professor McGonagall snapped.

Dumbledore said nothing at first, surveying the scene with a sweep of his ice-blue eyes.

'Professor Flitwick,' he said quietly, 'please go up to the hospital wing and inform Madam Pomfrey that she is needed.' The Professor nodded shortly and sped off without a word.

Turning back towards them, Dumbledore spoke simply: 'All those included in this event, you know who you are, will go up to my office and wait for me there.'

James glanced over to where Evans was still lying in a crumpled heap. 'P-Professor?' he murmered, 'I'm worried – I mean I think that Evans – _Lily _might be badly hurt.'

Dumbledore peered kindly at James over his half-moon spectacles. 'Why do you think I called for Madam Pomfrey, Mr Potter?'

'Oh I- I thought maybe Wilkes…' he trailed off.

'Mr Wilkes may also be in need of medical attention.' With this, Dumbledore turned away, ending the conversation. However, James had the distinct feeling that he had seem a small smile playing around the mouth of the strange, old professor.


	5. Pride and Painkillers

Chapter 5 – Pride and Painkillers

No-one spoke very much as, escorted by a livid Professor McGonagall, the group (minus Lily, Rosier, Wilkes and, conspicuously, Snape) made their way up to Dumbledore's office.

'_Jelly slugs.' _She practically spat as they reached the gargoyle that guarded the entrance. It sprang aside, revealing a spiral staircase which presumably led up to where the headmaster lived. Without a word, she marched up the stairs, leaving the others to scramble up quickly behind her before the entrance sealed once more.

The heavy oak door swung aside at McGonagall's touch, revealing the strangest room that James had ever seen. Multitudes of strange silver instruments whirred and puffed quietly on the various shelves lining the circular room. Behind Dumbledore's desk were a cluster of huge, elaborately painted portraits of the previous headmasters and headmistresses, all of whom appeared to be fast asleep. Perhaps the strangest ornament, however, was a huge bird, with red-and-gold plumage, which eyed them suspiciously from a perch near a great window overlooking the grounds.

'A phoenix.' Sirius breathed in wonder.

Bellatrix eyed the bird suspiciously.

McGonagall marched up to the desk and rounded on the group. 'I just want you all to know that I am _extremely _disappointed in each and every one of you. As magical students you all have the responsibility to handle the gifts that you have been given in a mature and sensible way. Today you have not only let your school and houses down – you have let yourselves down. I want to know what the meaning of this… _insubordination _was!'

No-one spoke.

'Well?' she demanded.

'They attacked-'James piped up, but Lucius Malfoy cut in smoothly.

'It was all a misunderstanding really, Professor,' Malfoy smiled smarmily 'Lily allowed her temperament to get the better of her, resulting in this… unfortunate series of events.'

'That's not true, you attacked her!' yelled James, rounding on Malfoy.

'While I understand that may have been what it looked like to an outsider-'

'Oh shove it up your arse, Malfoy.' Sirius snapped.

'BLACK,' McGonagall raged 'I will not have you using that language!'

Seemingly disturbed by McGonagall's sudden shout, the phoenix by the window took flight, sweeping round the room and coming to rest on the shoulder of Professor Dumbledore, who had entered silently. The expression on his wizened face was grave.

'I'm sure you will all be pleased to know that your actions today have not caused any serious damage.' He began simply, eyeing them all in turn. 'Miss Evans, in particular, suffered a nasty burn to her chest but, with the help of Madam Pomfrey, is sure to make a full recovery very soon.'

Bellatrix did not seem particularly happy to hear the news.

'However,' Dumbledore continued, 'I must impress upon you the severity of your actions. Any other day, you might have been expelled.'

'You're not expelling us?' Remus squeaked, seemingly unable to control himself.

Dumbledore surveyed Remus serenely over his half-moon spectacles, taking in his pale skin and the bags under his eyes. 'No, Mr Lupin, not today.'

'Why not?' Bellatrix demanded haughtily. She didn't seem particularly pleased by the news.

'You are always free to leave this school at any time, Miss Black,' Dumbledore's tone had cooled considerably. 'Your magical education is by no means compulsory. But these are dark times we live in. It is best for those of us who live in the light to remain together.'

Bellatrix flushed slightly but did not respond. James wondered how much longer she intended to remain 'in the light'.

'However, this school will _not _tolerate intolerance.' He continued. 'There are no mudbloods or blood traitors here – simply young witches and wizards who are the future of our society. If I_ ever_ hear any student in this school using that kind of language towards another again, I will have no choice but to have you removed.

You will all receive a month's worth of detentions for your actions and lose fifty points apiece from your houses. Let this serve as a reminder that the proper way of resolving conflicts is not through violence, but through kindness and understanding.'

Dumbledore surveyed the faces of each student in front of him. James and Sirius wore identical expressions – half disbelief, half relief. Bellatrix Black's face had regained its haughty facade and Malfoy's was a careful blank. Peter Pettigrew, as usual, looked rather frightened. Dumbledore lingered slightly on Remus, the careful composure in his twinkling blue eyes melted away slightly; giving way to something that looked awfully like pity.

'You may all leave.' He said simply. 'Mr Potter, in case you were wondering, Madam Pomfrey is allowing Miss Evans to have visitors now.'

James left the room with a distinct feeling that Dumbledore was a man who knew far too much.

* * *

Lily's head felt fuzzy. Her ears were buzzing as if there were a million bees flitting round them. Her eyes didn't seem to want to open fully and her vision was blurry. She propped herself up on her elbows, trying in vain to sit up. She felt a wave of vertigo.

'Don't you dare!' Madam Pomfrey warned, bustling over. 'You took a nasty burn to the chest. I'll be surprised if it doesn't scar.'

Lily looked down groggily to see that the upper half of her torso was wrapped in bandages. 'Wha-?' she exclaimed in confusion.

'Whatever spell that Slytherin girl used on you was a strong one.' The matron said grimly 'I did the best I could; you'll be just fine but that's going to sting for a few days. I gave you some pretty strong painkillers so you may feel rather strange for a while.'

The door of the hospital wing crashed open suddenly and James Potter came charging in, his friends at his heels. They came up short at the sight of Madam Pomfrey who allowed them five minutes with dire threats of what she would do if they overstayed their welcome.

James came to sit at the end of her bed, 'alright, Evans?' He tried to grin, but it slipped off his face. He was worried, Lily realised.

'Yeah, I'm good.' She answered, but her breath caught in her throat as a spasm of pain tore through her middle.

'That was a great fight, Lily.' Sirius interjected excitedly. 'You were pretty badass for a-'

'Don't say for a girl, Black.' Lily warned dangerously.

Sirius barked a laugh. 'God, even when she's wounded she's feisty. Nah, I was just gonna say you were pretty badass for someone who spends most of her time holed up in the library.'

Lily tried to throw him a dirty look but felt a smile creep into her lips. 'Yeah, I wasn't bad, was I?'

'No you weren't.' James said softly.

'Aaand I think we'll take that as our queue to leave,' smiled Remus. 'Get well soon Lily.' Grabbing Sirius and Peter by the arms, he dragged them to the door and out of the room.

James still wore a concerned face. 'I thought she'd killed you for a minute there, Evans.'

'Nah,' she grinned 'I'm made of stronger stuff than that.'

'Remind me never to cross you when you're on a rampage.' He joked.

'You always cross me, James.'

'I know.' He frowned.

Lily reached up absently and touched his face. Her fingers crept towards his mouth and smoothed out the harsh lines of worry there. 'Don't be sad.' She whispered.

'You're completely drugged up, Evans.' James laughed.

'Am not.'

'Are so.'

* * *

They sat in silence for a few moments. Evans looked up at him; her big, warm green eyes were wide. Her fingers were still on his face, resting lightly on his cheek. James tried not to think of the warmth that spread through his whole body from just that little touch.

'You still look sad.'

'I'm not sad, Evans, I'm angry. You got hurt today and I couldn't do anything to stop it.'

'I didn't need you to protect me you know.' She murmured. 'I'm stronger than you give me credit for.'

'I know,' he sighed, 'you're the strongest person I know. But I wanted to help anyway.'

'Why?'

'Because I-'

'You…'

Suddenly Madam Pomfrey came bustling in, breaking the moment. Evans' hand dropped from James' face, resting instead on the white duvet.

'You've had your five minutes,' the matron snapped. 'Out. Now.'

James rose unsteadily from the bed and looked down at Evans. Her eyes had slipped shut and her breathing was even. Asleep.

As he let himself out of the hospital wing, James wondered if Evans would remember much of the conversation they had just had.

He wondered if he wanted her to.

* * *

****A/N** Hey guys, I'm putting the AN at the bottom today because there's not anything vitally important I need to tell you. I hope you all like this new chapter, I was trying to build on the Jily relationship and add some more dimensions to the characters we know so well. I'm gonna try and keep updating as often as possible but I have loads of exams next week so we'll have to see how it goes. Thank you to everyone reading, following and reviewing; I love you all to the moon and back!**


	6. Detention

**Hey guys, I'm sooo sorry, I realise it's been ages since I posted the last chapter - I suck. I've had loads of exams this week and it's been really hectic. However, on the plus side, this is my last week of exams, so updates should be a lot more regular from now on!**

**Despite the wait, I hope this chapter is worth it! It's a lot longer than the others and well.. the story isn't rated T for nothing!**

**I hope you enjoy it! Let me know if it seems too... abrupt. Please send in reviews, it really helps me to improve my writing!**

* * *

Chapter 6 - Detention

Lily was discharged from the hospital wing the following morning, pleased to be told that the burn to her chest had healed nicely and she would be left with only a small scar between her breasts. Madam Pomfrey had provided her with a jar of ointment to apply nightly to the wound but, apart from that, Lily could go forward pretending that nothing had ever happened at all. This, coincidentally, was exactly what she planned to do.

The duel with Bellatrix Black was as much of an embarrassment to Lily as it seemed to be a focal point of conversation for everyone else at Hogwarts. News of what had happened had travelled fast and, by first period the day she returned, Lily was inundated with requests from people to recount the details of the fight – something she had no intention of doing.

It wasn't that Lily regretted her actions – Bellatrix had deserved a taste of her own medicine – but she wasn't sure that she'd really helped the muggleborn cause. Many of the members of Bellatrix's little gang seemed to have made it their sole purpose to harass and belittle anyone of non-magical parentage. They were trying to make people scared, Lily knew; their 'authority' had been challenged when a Gryffindor girl without notable magical lineage managed to hold her own in a fight against one of the most skilled young witches at Hogwarts. Bottom line – they were choosing to stay ignorant. It was easier for them to spread hate and fear than to question their beliefs about the inferiority of muggleborns.

For this reason, Lily kept to herself over the next few days, staying in the library at break and lunchtimes so as to avoid sparking another argument; getting expelled from Hogwarts wasn't really high on her list of priorities. Indeed, this was where Lily found herself three days after the fight – flicking through a huge textbook titled _'Great Goblin Wars of the Middle Ages'_.

She was staring into space moodily, absentmindedly twirling her wand between her fingers, when someone tapped her on the shoulder from behind.

Lily gritted her teeth and span around. 'Look, I'm not going to tell you anything about that stupid fight so – oh hello Remus.'

Remus Lupin smiled serenely, 'expecting someone else?'

'Just the hordes of people, who have been pestering me about that stupid Bellatrix incident,' she sighed. 'I'm sorry Rem, how are you?'

He didn't look great to be honest; he looked ill - pale and miserable. But he just replied calmly 'I'm fine. Don't worry about all the gossip – everyone'll find something else to talk about soon, especially with the Yule Ball coming up.'

'Oh god yeah, I hadn't even thought about that. Who are you taking?' she asked absently.

He blushed. 'Oh, I – er – I dunno. I wanted to maybe ask Mary but I'm not sure…' he trailed off lamely.

'You should ask her!'

'Really, I'm not sure if she'd want to…'

'Don't be silly Rem, you guys are friends.'

'Honestly I don't know if I'll even go. It depends on the date.' He said thoughtfully.

'Um… why?' she raised her eyebrows.

'Hmm? Oh no, nothing, I didn't – no reason.'

'Okay,' she replied, knowing not to push it. There was something up.

'Anyway,' he quickly changed the subject, 'I only came to tell you that detention's tonight. Nine o'clock, McGonagall's office.'

_'Oh bloody hell,' _Lily thought. However, she simply said 'thanks Rem.'

He nodded absently and then walked off. Lily watched him go, her brow furrowed. She and Remus had always been fairly good friends; he was much easier to get on with than James or Sirius. There was something about him that was soothing – he almost had a calming effect. However, recently he didn't seem himself; the light had gone from his eyes. Lily wondered what was going on.

* * *

At nine o'clock James found himself being dragged by a very persistent Remus to McGonagall's office.

'This is bloody ridiculous,' he exclaimed, 'we defend Evans from those wannabe death eater idiots and we get punished for it!'

They pushed open the heavy wooden door to find that everyone, including Evans, was already seated around McGonagall's desk.

The middle aged witch peered at them over her spectacles. 'At last,' she snapped, 'I was beginning to think you weren't coming.'

James looked at the clock. It was 9:03.

'Tonight you will all be doing a very specific job.' McGonagall continued grimly. 'As you all know, this school plays host to hundreds of ghosts whom have culminated here over the years. In particular, I'm sure you are all _well _acquainted with Peeves the Poltergeist.'

James grinned to himself. Peeves was by far the most interesting ghost at Hogwarts; famous for his wicked sense of humour, the mischievous spirit played havoc with students and staff alike. As much as he could be an annoying little blighter, Peeves was good for a laugh and James was never averse to seeing Snivellus hung up from a chandelier by his ears (one of Peeves' best pranks to date).

McGonagall paused to survey them all. 'Mr Filch, the caretaker, has informed me that Peeves is planning a large prank which will take effect during the Yule Ball. Tonight, I will need you all to pair up; each pair will be assigned a designated part of the castle to search for the poltergeist, and put a stop to his plans. Once you have caught him-'

'How are we meant to catch a ghost?' sneered Bellatrix.

'Ten points from Slytherin for interrupting, Miss Black. And in answer to your question, poltergeists can be stupefied; you should know that from your Defence Against the Dark Arts lessons.' McGonagall replied cooly. 'Once you have successfully knocked him out, you will return him to my office where he will be detained.'

* * *

_'We could've been given a worse job,' _Lily thought to herself _'at least we're not cleaning bedpans in the hospital wing.'_

McGonagall instructed them to quickly get into pairs. James was already edging closer to Sirius and Peter had sidled up to Remus. Lily did not intend to join up with any of the Slytherins, so she assumed she would go with Professor McGonagall.

However, the middle-aged witch had other ideas. 'Potter, Black – do you _really _think I'm stupid enough to allow you two a night together roaming the castle?'

'Why, Professor McGonagall, sometimes I feel like you don't trust us at all,' remarked Sirius, feigning heartache.

'Not one bit, Black.' She replied curly. 'Potter you will go with… Miss Evans. She ought to keep you in check.'

James glanced at Lily and wiggled his eyebrows. She narrowed her eyes in response.

'Black, with Bellatrix – perhaps some family bonding will do you good.'

Sirius looked thunderstruck and opened his mouth to argue. However, McGonagall shot him a dark look and his reply died on his lips. Without further ado, they were assigned areas of the castle and sent on their way.

* * *

Evans walked slightly ahead of him. Her arms were folded and, though he could not see her face, James knew she probably wore a half-irritated-half-defiant look.

'Evans?' he asked.

'What?' she snapped.

'You do realise you're going the wrong way if we want to get to the third floor corridor right?'

* * *

Lily sighed. She hadn't been looking where she was going; she had just wanted to get out of McGonagall's office. Up until now, she hadn't really realised how difficult it would be to be that close to Bellatrix. Lily had wanted to leap on the smug bitch and punch her lights out, but that probably wouldn't have gone down too well with McGonagall.

Spinning around, she marched back the way she had come – suddenly coming nose-to-nose (well more like nose-to-chest) with James who had been standing a lot closer than she had realised. She looked up.

_'Back away,' _she thought. She stayed where she was.

_'Just step back.' _His hand came up tentatively and brushed her arm.

_'He's an idiot.' _She moved away.

'Th-third floor corridor is this way.' She stuttered, walking past him quickly.

* * *

James allowed himself a sigh of frustration. For a minute there he had thought he'd seen something in Evans' eyes. The girl was nothing if not hard to understand but it had _seemed _for a moment- James shook himself. He was being an idiot.

They walked up the stairs in silence. Neither of them said a word as they wandered down the corridor. The lack of speech became a little uncomfortable after 5 minutes of looking aimlessly through classrooms, half-heartedly hoping for Peeves to show up.

Suddenly Evans turned to look at him. 'James?'

'Mmm?'

'What you did the other day – with Bellatrix – it really wasn't necessary.'

'I – what?'

James was shocked. It wasn't that he'd expected Evans to suddenly jump into his arms, confessing her undying love for the man who saved her. She'd done most of the dirty work herself anyway. However, things probably would've ended a lot worse for Evans if he hadn't lent a hand - she must have known that.

'It wasn't necessary.' She repeated, not looking him in the eye.

'I know it wasn't necessary, Evans, that's not why I did it.'

'So why did you do it exactly? Some sort of hero complex?'

'No, Evans, I did it because I wanted to okay?'

'I don't _need _you looking out for me.' She snapped.

'You didn't seem to mind too much in the hospital wing the other day, if I remember!' he retorted, losing his temper.

A blush crept up Evans' face at that, staining her cheeks a pretty pink. She looked down. 'I don't know what you're talking about.'

James sighed and ran a hand through his hair in exasperation. Before he could say anything else, Evans stalked off quickly.

* * *

Lily moved on ahead blindly. She could hear a creaking up ahead and followed the sound without thinking. It wasn't that she didn't feel grateful towards James – she did – but, at the same time, she didn't want to be anyone's damsel in distress. Lily wasn't one to allow others to do her dirty work for her and she didn't need James rushing in to save her every five minutes.

But that wasn't the most worrying thing. Lily hated James. She had always hated James because he wasn't the sort of person you liked. She didn't want to feel anything positive towards someone who invested so much time into being such an arrogant toerag. So why was it that every time he stood too close, her breath caught in her throat slightly?

The creaking got louder as she neared the end of the corridor. Lily rounded the corner and came up short at the sight of Peeves loosening the bolts holding a chandelier to the ceiling; some unlucky student would walk under there tomorrow and it would come crashing down on top of them.

Lily drew her wand but the poltergeist had already seen her.

'A student out of bed?' he cackled wickedly. 'Oh goodness gracious me. What a conundrum, what a farce! You can take that wand and shove it up your-'

'Shut it, Peeves.' barked James, who had caught up.

'Potty Potter? Taking a stroll with Angelic Evans are we? Planning to do something naughty I presume.'

* * *

James drew his wand and came to stand beside Evans, wondering how to proceed. Peeves was approaching them with a sinister look in his ghostly eye. It was unwise to cross a poltergeist at the best of times, let alone when he was already cooking up something nasty.

'Well don't let me stop you.' grinned Peeves with malice. 'In fact, let me give you some privacy!'

He grinned manically and lunged straight at them, his translucent fingers moulding themselves into sharp-looking talons before their eyes. With a yelp, James grabbed Evans by the waist and pulled her away from the poltergeist – they stumbled backwards and toppled through an open door behind them. In their hurry to get away from him, they had managed to fall right into a broom cupboard. As James stood up, the door snapped shut. He could hear cackling from the other side as Peeves locked it behind them.

'Have a nice night. Don't say Peevesy never gave you anything!'

* * *

Lily leaped up and battered at the door with her fists. 'Peeves! Peeves you let us out right now you stinking pile of shit! When I find you, I swear to God you are dead!'

'He's already dead, Evans.' James pointed out.

'This is _all your fault!' _she cried, rounding on him. 'Why the hell did you pull me back like that?'

'Maybe because he was about to attack you, think of that?'

'HE'S DEAD JAMES. What could he possibly do?'

'HE'S A POLTERGEIST EVANS. He can do whatever he wants!'

'Listen to me very carefully. I. Do. Not. Need. You. Trying. To. Save. Me.'

'What the hell is your problem?' James snapped. 'I'm trying to _help _you!'

'Why?' she demanded.

'BECAUSE I BLOODY LIKE YOU, EVANS!' he roared. 'Because you're brave, and passionate, and funny, and clever. Because I like talking to you. Because you make me laugh. Because I like seeing how much I piss you off. Because you call me out on my shit instead of letting me get away with it! I like you more than ever right now, despite the fact that you've been giving me grief all night!'

He took a deep breath and turned away, embarrassed. Lily's anger dissipated suddenly. She stared at him in disbelief. She couldn't remember James ever being so… honest. He wasn't the type to get riled up by anything – let alone a girl snapping at him.

Tentatively, Lily reached out and touched him on the shoulder. He tensed at the touch but turned to face her all the same.

* * *

Evans looked up at him. The fierce anger seemed to have drained from her face; her big eyes looked softer than he'd ever seen them.

'I- I'm sorry James.' she murmered.

He looked down at her. His first reaction was to brush off the apology; he wanted to make it look like nothing – James Potter didn't let his feelings get hurt by some girl. His next thought was one of embarrassment. Then came confusion.

'It's fine, Evans, don't worry.' He grinned half-heartedly, 'nothing bothers me, remember?'

Her hand snapped out and slapped his chest.

'Don't do that James!' she snarled.

'What?'

'Stop acting like nothing bothers you! Stop acting like you don't care about anything!'

'I'm not acting, Evans, maybe I'm just the stuck up arsehole you think I am.'

Her hand snaked out again but he caught her wrist before she could slap him. They stood in silence for a moment, staring at each other.

* * *

James' grip on her wrist wasn't tight. Lily could draw her hand back at any time, but she left it there. He looked into her eyes and she looked into his, both of them refusing to be the first to break the stare.

'You're not the person everyone thinks you are, James.' Lily said simply.

'No?'

'No. Maybe you were once but I think you've changed.'

'I'm an arrogant toerag, remember?'

'I can see through the arrogant toerag façade sometimes.' she smiled. 'You're just like the rest of us really James.'

'Are you saying I'm nice?'

'I'm saying I reckon you might just be a good person.'

'I wouldn't take that bet, Evans.'

'I would.' She closed the gap between them.

* * *

James' eyes widened as Evans moved forward and planted a soft kiss on his lips. He still gripped her arm loosely, even when she drew away staring at him defiantly – daring him to make a joke.

'For the record,' she breathed 'I remember everything I said in the hospital wing.'

That was enough for James.

* * *

James grabbed Lily by the waist and drew her to him, crushing his lips to hers. His mouth was soft and warm, and he _definitely _knew what to do with it.

Backing her against the wall, his hand drifted to her waist almost nervously. She smiled into the kiss and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, signalling to him that it was okay to carry on. Their mouths parted slightly, deepening the kiss. Lily felt flushed, especially when his hand wandered upwards, exploring new territory.

His lips left hers and meandered downwards to her neck. She arched her back slightly, a moan escaping her mouth. James chuckled and caught her bottom lip between his teeth, tugging slightly.

Lily felt herself respond to James almost uncontrollably. All rational thought left her mind as she wrapped one of her legs around his, pulling him closer. She grabbed at his tie with one hand, the other was pressed against his chest.

BANG!

The door to the broom cupboard burst open, revealing a furious-looking Professor McGonagall, clutching her wand. She swiftly took in the scene: Lily backed against the wall by James, who had luckily dropped his hand to his side just in time.

A head popped round the doorframe.

'Bloody hell, Prongs,' grinned Sirius, 'didn't know you had it in you!'


	7. Fallout

**Chapter 7 - Fallout**

Lily felt her face flush furiously red as she ducked under Professor McGonagall's arm and stalked down the corridor. Peeves had apparently disappeared but she could still hear Sirius roaring with laughter.

As they re-entered McGonagall's office, the black-haired witch cleared her throat somewhat uncomfortably. 'Ahem, I'm sure you will all be pleased to know that Peeves the poltergeist has been successfully found and subdued thanks to Miss and Mr Black. You are all, ah, dismissed. Miss Evans, perhaps you would like to leave first.'

Internally thanking McGonagall, Lily left the room and sped towards the common room as fast as she could. She entered moments before the boys and started up the stairs to her dormitory. As they entered, Lily could hear Sirius making various rather inappropriate comments about the 'next steps' of James and Lily's relationship.

James glanced over to the girl's staircase and saw Lily already near the top.

'Evans!' he called, but she was already gone.

Over the next few weeks James tried in various ways to get Evans to talk to him; whether it was at breakfast in the great hall, on their way down to Charms, or in the common room in the evenings. Once, he had actually slipped into the girl's toilets in order to try and speak to her before she could run off in the opposite direction; this escapade ended with her throwing numerous items from her bag at him until he eventually retreated. Bottom line: Evans did not want to talk about the broom cupboard incident.

Of course Sirius wasn't exactly helping; every time James and Lily got within a metre of each other, he would wolf whistle or waggle his eyebrows suggestively. Although the whistling had subsided somewhat since Evans bewitched Sirius' tongue to tie itself into a knot every time he opened his mouth. She had refused to remove the enchantment for a good two days, meaning that Sirius had to communicate through a kind of crude sign language – much to James' amusement.

'I told you not to mess with Evans.' James grinned smugly.

'Oh shove it up your arse, Prongs.' Sirius grumbled, although he couldn't resist a grin – he loved mischief in all its forms.

However, as much as James wanted to spend time thinking about Evans, he had other important things on his mind. He came down to breakfast one morning to find a small, square package lying next to his bowl of porridge. Opening it carefully, he felt his eyes go round; there, on a tiny cushion, lay a red-and-gold badge – the Quidditch Captain's badge.

'No bloody way!' exclaimed Sirius with glee, tearing the badge out of James' hands. 'Prongs you bloody bastard! Prefect, Quidditch Captain… you gonna go up for Head Boy next year too mate?'

James noticed Evans settle herself a few seats a way. He reclined in his chair and grinned, purposely messing up his hair. 'I dunno, Padfoot,' he replied in a loud voice, 'I can't be doing too well – we all know Evans likes a bad boy!'

Evans turned to face him, no doubt about to come out with a sarcastic comment. However, upon seeing the captain's badge glistening in his hand, she arched an eyebrow.

'I suppose congratulations are in order, James.' She smiled.

He leaned forwards. 'And how would you propose to congratulate me?'

'By not hexing your best mate?'

'As tempting as that sounds, I rather enjoyed the silence last time.' Ignoring Sirius' indignant look, James ploughed on. 'I have an idea, Evans, why don't you come to my next Quidditch game.'

She blinked. 'Why d'you want me to come to your Quidditch game?'

'Why not,' he grinned, 'you could be my little cheerleader.'

'Golly James, are you sure? I'm not sure I deserve the privilege.' She replied sarcastically, chucking a roll at his head.

He caught it in mid-air. 'Seriously, Evans, you're my lucky charm. If we lose to Slytherin it'll be on you…'

'Ugh fine, but if you think I'm being your cheerleader-'

'I expect pom-poms.' James replied seriously.

In the days that passed, Lily still mainly kept away from James and his friends, despite having agreed to make an appearance at the first Quidditch game of the season. What Lily hadn't told James was that she always went to his games; despite herself, she enjoyed watching him mucking about on the broom.

On Thursday evening, she found herself in the common room staring moodily into the fire. There was only one thing on her mind – the kiss. As much as she had tried to forget about it, the thought of James' lips on hers kept creeping back into her thoughts. His hands had been rough, she remembered, and she'd liked the way they slid up her arms – creating goosebumps on her skin. He had been surprisingly gentle too; for someone so cocky and sure of himself he hadn't exactly been controlling or overbearing. Lily had met his lips with as much enthusiasm as he had hers – and she had been enthusiastic.

Suddenly, the portrait hole was flung open to reveal Marlene McKinnon and Alice Longbottom who were giggling about something. Marlene stopped in her tracks at the sight of Lily sitting alone.

'Alright there, stranger?' she grinned. 'Long time no see!'

'Hey Marl,' Lily replied, tearing thoughts of James from her mind.

'Don't bloody 'hey Marl' me, where the hell have you been for the past couple of weeks?'

'I'm sorry; I've just been really busy!'

'Oh yeah, it must be so hard living the life of Little Miss Perfect.' Marlene winked, flopping down next to Lily.

'Hullo, Lily.' Smiled Alice serenely, perching on the arm of Marlene's chair.

'Hi Ally, how's Frank?'

'Oh Frank's good; he's gone to visit his grandmother in Ireland for a week.'

'I wondered when you two were gonna make it official-' Lily began, but was cut off my Marlene.

'Yeah, yeah, they're adorable – it makes me sick. But what's going on with you and Mr Potter 'ey? A little birdy told me you guys were having fun in a broom cupboard!'

'Would this little birdy be called Sirius Black by any chance?'

'Now _that_ would be telling.'

Lily rolled her eyes; she was uncomfortably aware that her friend often acted very much like a female version of Sirius – except a lot more bearable (mostly).

'There's nothing going on with me and James.' she assured Marlene.

'So he won't be taking you to the Yule Ball then?'

'Not a chance in Hell.'

'Six galleons says you're wrong.' Marlene grinned.

Sometimes Lily felt like other people had more influence over her love life than she did.

James surveyed the group in front of him with grim satisfaction. Quidditch try-outs had gone as well as he could have hoped and, a couple of bruises and bloody lips later, Gryffindor had wound up with a pretty impressive team. There were a couple of exciting new additions including Emily Bell, a nimble and talented Chaser, and Jenna Spinnet, who wielded her Beater's club with impressive (but good natured) malice. The only problem was their seeker; Frank Longbottom generally filled that position, but he was away for the next couple of weeks, which meant that the team wouldn't get much of a chance to practice with him before the first big game.

'It'll be fine, mate.' Said Sirius confidently, 'Frank'll be here.'

'And what if he's not? Or he can't play 'cause he hasn't been practising?'

'Worst comes to worst you'll need a new seeker.'

'And where am I gonna find one of those exactly?'

Sirius glanced up to the stands, where Remus Lupin was huddled under a cloak, reading a book. It was starting to rain as they approached him.

'Y'alright mate?' James asked flippantly. However, he was watching Remus intently – taking in the paleness of his face, which made his scars stand out starkly. He had started to look better after the last full moon, but he was beginning to look peaky again.

'Yeah, I'm good. Just doing some background research on Hinkypunks.'

'Fascinating.' Replied Sirius dryly.

'Listen, Moony, I've got a favour to ask you.' James began, trying to tread carefully.

'Yeah, of course, what can I do?'

Though he'd never admit it, the eagerness in Remus' tone broke James' heart. He was always trying to do things for other people, regardless of the personal cost – overcompensating. No matter how much James, Sirius and Peter told him differently, Remus would always believe that he needed to make up for what he was. He just couldn't forgive himself. James didn't know how to make him understand that there was nothing to forgive.

'We're in need of those keen werewolf senses, Moony.' Sirius grinned, seemingly oblivious to James' inner turmoil.

'Oh?' Remus replied, the keenness fading from his voice slightly.

'We need a seeker, mate,' James began reluctantly 'I don't know if Frank is gonna be able to play the first match of the season, and I've seen you on a broom – you're good.'

'Oh,' Remus said again 'look, it's not that I don't want to help, but… I can't…'

'It's just one game.'

'I'm sorry; that kind of attention… it's just not a good idea.'

'I understand, Moony.' James sighed.

'I'm so sorry.' Remus looked miserable.

There was a rather pregnant pause.

Sirius pulled Remus to his feet, wrapping an arm around his shoulder. 'Don't worry about it mate.' He barked a laugh, a little too enthusiastically. 'Old Frank will just have to up his game.'


	8. The Game

Chapter 8 – The Game

The morning of the Gryffindor-Slytherin match dawned bright and crisp. James ate breakfast hurriedly, ignoring Peter and Sirius who were chatting across him as if they hadn't a care in the world. Even Remus seemed cheerful, tucking into his sausages with uncharacteristic gusto. They were all excited, James knew, this game was a real opportunity for the Gryffindors to get one-up on the competition. There had always been healthy rivalry between houses but it was common knowledge that there was particular tension between Gryffindor and Slytherin – a tension that often led to very violent Quidditch matches.

The violence wasn't something that worried James, what was life without a little risk? However, the prospect of losing his first Quidditch match as Captain of the team was too much to bear. The thought of having to face Lucius Malfoy around school every day… James wasn't sure his ego could take it.

'Heads up, James,' Sirius interrupted his train of thought, 'look who just walked in.'

James' head snapped up in time to see a very flustered looking Frank Longbottom enter the Great Hall, his trunk in one hand and his broomstick in the other. He looked travel-worn and stressed.

'Well,' said Remus uncertainly, 'at least your seeker has arrived.'

'_Looking like he hasn't slept in 3 years_' James thought grimly.

_'Shit.´_ thought Lily. '_Shit, bollocks, cock with knobs on._'

Why had she let Marlene talk her into this?

No-one spoke much as the team got ready for kickoff. Frank looked particularly pale as he threw on his red-and-gold team kit.

James called them all over. 'Right everyone,' he began, trying to sound confident, 'this is it. The big one. If we win today I swear to Merlin I'll buy each and every one of you enough dungbombs to give Filch a heart attack!'

That drew a chuckle.

'We've got a stronger team than the Slytherins,' James continued, 'we've trained harder, worked longer.'

'Not to mention we're better looking.' Sirius grinned.

'I dunno,' Jenna Spinnet joked, 'that Mulciber isn't too bad.'

'Jenna, I swear to God, I will push you off the astronomy tower if you ever say that again.' Sirius replied, only half joking.

She whacked him with her Cleansweep Five, causing him to topple gracelessly into a spare pile of Gryffindor robes.

'Oi, knock it off you two! I don't need my bloody team bruised and battered before the game's even begun.' James mock-scolded, secretly enjoying the indignant look on his best friend's face.

The Gryffindor team left the changing rooms feeling considerably more cheerful than when they had entered.

Lily took her place right at the front of the stands alongside Marlene, Alice, Mary and a fierce-looking Ravenclaw called Emmeline Vance.

'I'm supporting Gryffindor.' She had announced matter-of-factly, shaking her dyed bubblegum-pink hair in a confident manner. Indeed, she had decided to join the girls in their latest escapade, even painting her face entirely red-and-gold for the occasion.

Lily leaned over to Emmeline. 'Are we sure this is a good idea? If McGonagall catches us-'

'We're just showing some school spirit, Evans.' She grinned wickedly.

'Besides,' Marlene chimed in, 'your boy James will certainly like it.'

Lily chose not to reply to that.

The Gryffindor team lined up, facing the seven Slytherin players opposite them. They certainly looked like an intimidating bunch; Andreas Nott in particular was about twice the height of James and at least three times as thick – perfect beater material. James noticed him taking in Jenna Spinnet's skinny arms, grinning nastily.

_'Just wait til you see what the girl can do with them.' _James thought with grim satisfaction.

'Captains shake hands.' Madam Hooch called.

James stepped forwards, coming chest to chest with Lucis Malfoy. They gripped hands tightly, each trying to inflict as much pain as possible. James didn't flinch.

'Good luck,' Malfoy sneered, 'you'll certainly need it allowing such… people onto your team.'

James knew exactly what he was talking about; looking back over his shoulder he eyed Tobias Wood – Gryffindor's muggleborn keeper.

'Why don't you shove your broom up your-'

'Captains to your positions please!' Madam Hooch called again.

Malfoy smiled nastily as he mounted his broom.

The whistle was blown.

James kicked off from the hard ground, feeling the wind ruffle his hair as he soared upwards. Quickly, he did a lap of the pitch – partly to get his bearings and partly to show off. The crowd cheered as he passed by, and did a loop-the-loop for the benefit of a group of third year Hufflepuffs who immediately began giggling. His eyes quickly swept the stadium, searching for a familiar shock of red hair, signifying a promise to be kept – however, he found nothing.

Focussing back on the game, he saw Madam Hooch throw the Quaffle into the air – signifying that that match had begun.

'AAAAND IT'S SLYTHERIN'S POMADORA PARKINSON WITH THE QUAFFLE,' came the familiar voice of the commentator, Jemima Jordan, 'PARKINSON PASSES TO GREEN, WHO PASSES TO ZABINI, WHO PASSES BACK TO PARKINSON. PARKINSON STREAKS HER WAY UP THE PITCH, IT LOOKS LIKE SHE'S GOING TO SCORE – AAAND IS HIT IN THE FACE WITH A BLUDGER FROM JENNA SPINNET!'

Grinning with relief, James dived back into the game intercepting the Quaffle that Pomadora Parkinson had dropped. He dodged both Zabini and Green, who tried to attack from both sides, sending them crashing into eachother.

'JAMES POTTER STREAKS DOWN THE PITCH TOWARDS THE SLYTHERIN GOALS, DODGING MULCIBER'S BLUDGER LIKE IT'S A FLY. AND WHAT A LOOKER THAT BOY IS, REALLY, IT'S A SHAME I DON'T SWING THAT WAY – sorry, Professor McGonagall, sorry!'

James ducked and weaved between players, speeding towards the goalposts and the Slytherin keeper, Rabastan Lestrange. He quickly aimed the shot and fired it straight into the third goal, Lestrange's gloved fingers missing it by inches.

'YEEESSSS! POTTER SCORES! TEN POINTS TO GRYFFINDOR!' Jemima screamed, punching the air.

Lily grinned in spite of herself as James took a celebratory lap around the pitch, showing off his skills unnecessarily.

'When are we doing this?' Alice called over the roars of the crowd.

'Soon!' Marlene replied. 'When the game's really got going!'

Lily felt a tap on her shoulder and turned round to see Remus Lupin seated behind her.

'Hello Lily,' he smiled, 'enjoying the game?'

'Y'alright Rem? Yeah, James is good – I mean the _whole team_ is good!'

He laughed knowingly. 'Yeah, the _team _can be an arrogant toetag sometimes but the _team _is a bloody good player!'

'Shut up!' she laughed. It was quite surprising to see Remus like this, actually, he seemed energised – excitable even. 'I didn't know you were a Quidditch fan!'

'Yeah, I love it! My dad and I used to go and watch it all the time… not so much anymore though.'

'Why not?'

'Oh he's… busy.' Remus replied vaguely.

'Have you ever considered trying out for the team?' Lily asked.

'Ah – no, no I wouldn't be right… anyway, I prefer watching.'

Just then screams erupted from the crowd. Frank Longbottom, who had been idly hovering by the goalposts looking out for the snitch had gone into a dive his arm reaching out. Lucius Malfoy saw this and was on his tail in a heartbeat, covering more ground on his superior broom. It was evident who had gotten more training over the past weeks, Malfoy sped forwards while Frank began to waver as they hurtled to the ground. Malfoy grabbed at Frank's robes, pulling him backwards and tightening the neckline of Frank's shirt into a chokehold. The Gryffindor seeker began to choke but Malfoy held on, desperately trying to get to the snitch first.

_CRACK_

The sound of wood hitting flesh resonated through the grounds as Sirius, seeing what was happening, threw his beaters bat straight at the back of Malfoy's head causing him to topple the last few feet from his broom.

'AND GRYFFINDOR'S SIRIUS BLACK UTILISES, ah, RATHER UNCONVENTIONAL TACTICS IN ORDER TO STOP THE BLANTANT STRANGULATION OF A FELLOW TEAMMATE.'

'Jemima you have to be objective!' McGonagall could be heard scolding the girl.

Madam Hooch was furious. 'We _never _use beater's bats as weapons in Quidditch, Black, you know that!'

'But he was trying to kill Frank!' Sirius argued hotly.

'Don't be so melodramatic!'

In the end, the snitch was lost and both teams were awarded a penalty.

'Wait for it…' Marlene whispered.

Pomadora Parkinson took the penalty for Slytherin, but the goal was easily blocked by Tobias Wood, who seemed to have an incredible knack for sensing exactly where the Quaffle was going to go before it went there.

'Ha! Take that you racist bastards!' Emily Bell yelled. Nott aimed a bludger at her. She dodged it easily and poked her tongue out at him.

James lined up to take the next shot. The crowd held its breath collectively. Green had managed to sneak one goal in while Lily had been talking to Remus, so the score stood at ten all – anyone's game. James took his time, hovering before the goalposts, Lestrange eyeing him carefully. Then, quick as a wink, his arm shot out sending the Quaffle sailing through Rabastan's outstretched fingers.

The crowd went wild.

'NOW!' Marlene screamed.

The four girls stood up, dropping the warm cloaks they had been wearing up til that point.

James felt elation seize him as he circled the pitch once more, grinning from ear to ear. Sirius zoomed up behind him, pulling him roughly into a one-armed hug.

'Knew you could do it, Prongs!'

James laughed. They were beating Slytherin by a margin of ten points, good but not good enough. He flew over to Frank.

'Listen, mate,' he instructed, 'don't catch the snitch until we've got at least 30 more points than them. I don't wanna leave this to chance.'

Frank nodded absently.

'You alright, Frank?' James asked worriedly.

'Yeah… just didn't get any sleep on the way back.'

Before James could reply, he heard chanting. Looking down he noticed a group of Gryffindor girls; moving in for a closer look, his eyes widened in astonishment. The girls were dressed in miniscule outfits – tiny red mini-skirts with gold edges and matching cropped tops. They were all chanting the same mantra:

_'We're Gryffindor,_

_Hear us roar!_

_We're the ones you want,_

_What you turned up for!'_

They then continued to chant the names off all the players on the team:

'_Potter, Bell, Prewett, Black, Spinnet, Wood, Longbottom!'_

James suddenly realised who it was bouncing around before him. Marlene McKinnon, Alice Prewett, Emmeline Vance and – _EVANS! _In her hands she held a pair of bright gold pom-poms and was waving them around with gusto; catching him staring at she winked cheekily, causing James to lose feeling in his lower region for a few seconds. He was so caught up with staring at Evans' décolletage; he forgot that he was meant to be playing a game. It was only when Sirius flew up and smacked him on the back of the head that he remembered and was forced to fly off to re-join his teammates.

Soon the whole of the Gryffindor crowd, and many of the Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff spectators, were chanting the mantra along with the girls. This served to spur the Gryffindor team on and enrage the Slytherins further. Each team scored a goal apiece within the next five minutes, bringing the score up to 30-20 to Gryffindor. They needed 2 more goals before Frank could start searching for the snitch.

'AAAAND POTTER NICELY INTERCEPTS A SLYTHERIN PASS, SENDING THE QUAFFLE STRAIGHT TO BELL.' Jemima Jordan began again 'PERHAPS IT'S THE THRILL OF A NEW SEASON OR THE THRILL OF SEEING THOSE GRYFFINDOR CHEERLEADERS, BUT JAMES POTTER IS ON FIRE TODAY!

BELL PASSES TO PREWETT, WHO PASSES TO POTTER WHO PASSES BACK TO BELL, WHO GETS HIT BY A NASTY BLUDGER FROM ANDREAS NOTT AND DROPS THE QUAFFLE. NOT – er _drops _the Quaffle, which is then picked up by Green who serves to er drop it again.'

The Gryffindors had all picked up the rhyme quickly and were screaming at the top of their lungs. In her peripheral vision, Lily saw Remus and Peter jumping up and down in excitement.

Lily's eyes drifted to Frank Longbottom, who was staring intently at the Slytherin goal, evidently waiting for something. Suddenly shape appeared behind him, wielding a beater's bat. Poor Frank never saw it coming as the huge figure of Nott smashed a bludger into the back of his head from less than 2 metres away. Frank dropped like a stone and landed with a nasty crunch on the pitch. He didn't move.

Alice screamed. A whistle was blown. Time out was called.

James zoomed down to the grassy pitch as fast as he possibly could, throwing aside his broom hastily in order to get to his seeker. Frank lay very still on the ground, blood pooling from the back of his head.

Sirius landed next to James but wasted no time dropping to the floor to see what had been evident from the air – Frank was out cold. As Madam Pomfrey bustled onto the pitch, Sirius whirled around and stalked up to Nott, who was grinning like an idiot.

'YOU FUCKING TWAT!' Sirius yelled, getting right in Nott's face. 'YOU CAN'T DO THAT TO SOMEONE, YOU COULD'VE KILLED HIM!'

'Relax, Black,' Nott grinned smugly 'your little seeker should be able to take a beating by now.'

'What's that supposed to mean?'

'Well let's just say your cousin Bellatrix has taken a personal liking to pushing little Frank around a bit.'

Sirius' eyes seemed to deaden. His hand clenched into a fist.

'Padfoot, NO!' James cried, but it was too late. Sirius fist smashed into Nott's jaw with force that sent the larger boy tumbling to the floor, clutching his face.

Sirius moved forward to continue to assault but James grabbed him in a backwards bear hug, pulling him away from all members of the Slytherin team.

'C'mon Padfoot, leave it. Remember what Dumbledore said!'

'Fuck you!' Sirius screamed at Nott. 'And tell my bitch of a cousin that next time she wants to assault my friends, I'll kill her!'

'Not if she kills you first!' Nott replied.

James dragged a heavily-breathing Sirius over to where Frank still lay on the ground. He seemed to have regained consciousness but looked dazed and confused.

'He's got a concussion.' Madam Pomfrey stated. 'He can't play any further.'

'We can't play without a seeker!' Jenna Spinnet cried.

'There's no-one else,' James replied. 'I can go in as seeker but we'll never win with only two chasers!'

'So what, we forfeit?' Sirius asked flatly.

'No,' came a voice.

James looked up. Remus stood before him, looking tired and battered but determined. 'I'll step in.'

Sirius shook his head. 'Mate, you don't have to do this.'

'I know why you had your reservations, Moony,' James continued from Sirius, 'I'd never put that on you.'

'You're not putting anything on me, James, I owe you.'

James was about to open his mouth to argue that Remus owed him nothing, but then he shut it. '_Merlin knows, I'm going to Hell for this.' _He gave Remus a brusque nod and the boy picked up Frank's broom as he was carted off on a stretcher.

'Let's do this.' He said grimly.

Time out was over and both teams rose into the air again. Lily squinted through the crowd, trying to find out who they had found to replace Frank. She got her answer when Remus zipped through the air, smooth as silk.

'Oh my God.' She breathed.

The Gryffindor chant started up again quickly. There was more anger in it this time, though. The atmosphere was charged, everyone wanting revenge for the injustice done to Frank Longbottom. Indeed, Jenna Spinnet wasted no time sending a bludger flying at Nott.

'A beater cannot hit another beater with a bludger!' Madam Hooch scolded, but her heart wasn't in it. She wanted to see the Slytherin punished just as much as everyone else.

The game became increasingly more violent. Wood seemed to be the victim of a lot of Slytherin abuse; bluders, tackles and general violent attacks all seemed to be aimed his way. Plenty of times, he had to drop from in front of the goal just in time to prevent from being knocked off his broom. This meant that Slytherin managed to get a couple of sly goals in, without even having to worry about Gryffindor defence.

The game was getting dirtier by the minute.

However, for every goal the Slytherins scored, the Gryffindors would respond with power and rage. You didn't harm a member of the team and get away with it. James scored two more goals, Emily Bell scored three.

Soon they were ten points up.

Twenty.

Thirty.

'REMUS NOW!' James yelled, as he burst through a line of Slytherins trying to block his path. He quickly passed the Quaffle to Emily and zipped round to see Remus swoop through the sky like lightning, searching for the snitch.

_'C'mon Moony!' _James thought.

Out of the corner of his eye, James saw something shiny. It glimmered like a beacon of hope. The snitch.

'MOONY!' James practically screamed.

Remus whipped round and followed James' eye line. He blinked, seeming to forget where he was for a second. Then his expression focussed, his eyes seemed to blacken. For a second he was incredibly still, like a hunter – like a wolf.

Suddenly Remus put on a burst of speed and shot like a bullet vertically downwards. The crowd screamed, the team screamed, even Professor McGonagall screamed.

Remus hurtled to the ground, not slowing. Malfoy was on his tail now, gaining speed.

Remus' arm reached out. As did Malfoy's.

They were meters away from the ground.

Inches.

Centimeters.

Remus pulled up from his dive. Malfoy did not. He landed with a sickening crunch on the floor while Remus rose, rose, rose. His hand was clenched into a fist.

He had it.

He had the snitch.

The game was over.

Jemima Jordan was shouting. 'GRYFFINDOR WIN, GRYFFINDOR WIN! SUCK IT NOTT YOU CHEATING'- McGonagall wrenched the microphone out of her grip.

On the ground James ran over to Moony and jumped on him, Sirius followed, then the rest of the team. They landed in a sweaty pile on the floor.

The crowd ran onto the pitch, screaming and shouting.

James rose unsteadily, tears in his eyes and smacked Sirius on the back proudly. They hugged for a moment like brothers, and then Sirius released James from his grip, looking over his shoulder. James turned around.

There was Evans in all her scantily clad glory, grinning from ear to ear.

'You did it James!' she yelled 'I guess I should congratulate you!'

'So congratulate me.' He replied.

James Potter grabbed Lily Evans and crushed his lips to hers for the whole world to see. And, for once, she didn't pull away.


	9. The Beginning of the End

***A/N** Hey guys, so I realise that my posting these chapters has been a little random lately - I haven't done a particularly good job of timekeeping. I was wondering if theres maybe a specific time/day you guys would prefer I posted.**

**And more importantly, what do _you _think is happening at the end of this chapter?**

* * *

Unfortunately for James, the kiss was cut short suddenly as he was gripped by the back of his robes and yanked into a swirling crowd of people, all vying for the attentions of the Gryffindor chaser. Over the heads of the excitable students, James saw Evans reach up to touch her lips lightly, a puzzled expression on her face.

As he was hoisted onto the burly shoulders of Fabian Prewett and Tobias Wood, James grinned goofily to himself – not even minding when his head was knocked against the frame of the castle doors as he was carried up to the Gryffindor common room.

James quickly lost sight of Evans, but was pleased to see that Remus had also been hoisted up onto the crowd's shoulders. As they were dumped unceremoniously onto the floor of the common room, his friend looked around in giddy disbelief, seemingly unable to comprehend the congratulations that were aimed his way.

Sirius fought his way to the front of the crowd. 'Three cheers for our bloody brilliant captain and seeker!' he roared, grabbing James and Remus' hands and holding them aloft. The crowd roared their approval.

'And here's to Gryffindor winning the house cup this year!' Jenna Spinnet chimed in, climbing up on a table. She winked at Sirius, who grinned deviously in reply. He then dived back into the mass of people, wading towards Peter. Whispering something in Wormtail's ear, they both scampered off quickly.

James scanned the room for a shock of bright red hair but, to his slight disappointment, could not see Evans anywhere.

* * *

Lily made her way up to the Gryffindor common room feeling somewhat dazed. She could not help but reach up and touch her lips again, tracing where James' had been just a few minutes previously. If the kiss in the broom cupboard had been hot, this one was a fucking house fire. Lily recalled how James had still been out of breath from the exertion of the game; his lips had been hot and moved over hers triumphantly. She could still taste the tang of victory on her lips; whether that had come from his beating Slytherin or finally slipping past Lily's cool exterior, she wasn't sure.

'Earth to Lils!' Marlene called, waving a hand in front of Lily's eyes, snapping her out of her reverie.

'What? Oh- er yeah…'

'You have no idea what I just said, do you?'

'Of course I do!' Lily lied, raising her chin indignantly.

'So you agree that you and Potter are completely, 100% going to become a couple then?' Marlene replied mischieviously.

'_What?' _Lily exclaimed. 'Of course not, don't be ridiculous! Just because James and I kissed _one time_ does not mean we're suddenly soul mates.'

'Oh face it, Lils, you're gonna marry that boy.'

Lily tried to glower at her in response, but felt the expression slip off her face as she reached up to touch her lips once more.

As they neared the portrait hole, Lily saw Sirius and Peter dart around the corner just in front of her, their robes bulging.

'…had no idea that passageway under the one-eyed Witch led straight into Honeydukes!' Sirius was saying. 'We'll have to add that to the map.'

'What've you got there?' Marlene asked, gesturing to Sirius' bulging robes.

'Just some supplies for the party.' Sirius winked, producing a bottle of Odgen's Old Firewhisky from his pocket. He chucked it to Lily. 'There you are, Lils, now I expect you to get royally fucked out of your mind or I shall be _extremely _disappointed in you.'

Sirius ducked through the portrait hole and was met with cheers as he and Peter passed around their bounty. Lily just shook her head in disbelief and untwisted the cap on the bottle of Firewhisky. _'Well,' _she thought _'if I'm going to be making bad decisions tonight, I may as well have something to blame it on.'_

* * *

James was recounting the details of the Quidditch match for what felt like the hundredth time (not that he minded much) when he spotted Evans' red head appearing through the portrait hole.

'Excuse me, ladies,' he said smoothly, to the bunch of pretty fifth years he was telling his story to, 'I have somewhere to be. I'm sure my friend will be happy to take over.' He pushed Remus forward into the limelight, winking at his exasperated expression.

Weaving his way through the throngs of people, he came up short at the sight of Evans holding an almost-full bottle of Firewhisky.

He cleared his throat and she turned around.

'Well…' he said awkwardly, 'this is certainly unchartered territory.'

'Hello James.' Evans replied formally.

'Aaaand that's my queue to leave.' Marlene remarked. She gave James a congratulatory smack on the back and Evans a conspiratorial wink before quickly disappearing.

'You played well today.' Evans began nervously.

'Ah thanks,' James replied, 'you – erm – danced well…' He was momentarily lost for words – a first for James in many ways.

'Well this idiot made me promise…' Evans grinned, surprising James by taking a swig from the bottle she held.

He leaned over and plucked the drink out of her hand. 'Sounds like an idiot.' He remarked drily, gulping a mouthful of the firewhisky. It burned all the way down, causing him to splutter slightly.

'Keep up, Potter,' Evans smirked, sauntering away from him.

James wasn't sure if it was the firewhisky that was making him feel rather warm inside.

* * *

All around her, the party was starting to get going. Someone was playing The Blibbering Humdingers' new album very loudly and people were yelling and dancing (evidently helped by the 'supplies' Sirius had brought along).

Indeed, Sirius himself was already locked in a passionate tussle with Jenna Spinnet, whose tongue was currently exploring new territory within his mouth.

Lily could already feel the firewhisky she had drunk going to her head as she flopped onto a loveseat, pulling James down with her. She grabbed the bottle out of his hands and quickly took another gulp.

'You know what I like about you, Potter?' she yelled over the booming music.

'What's that, Evans?'

'You don't bloody give up, do you? Very dedicated. I commend that.'

'Well I've always known you were secretly in love with me, Evans, it was just a matter of time!'

She smacked him over the head. Chuckling, James grabbed her arm and pulled her towards him until they were nose-to-nose; his hair had fallen low, obscuring his brown eyes. Lily reached tentatively with her other hand and swept the hair out of his face; she saw the question in his eyes and nodded fractionally.

James lips met hers for the third time in her life. This kiss was slow and sweet – almost shy, really. She could taste the firewhisky on his lips and breathed in his familiar musk-and-peppermint smell. Lily's hand moved to rest on James' shoulders. Very suddenly, without breaking the kiss, he grabbed her by the waist and pulled her onto his lap, facing him, so she was straddling his hips.

Lily gasped slightly and felt James smile into her lips. She deepened the kiss and felt him respond positively, one hand slipping down from her waist to cup her hip. She knew somewhere in her mind that this was probably wrong – that she would regret this later – but she tried to sweep that thought aside. Yes, James could be an arsehole. Yes, for the majority of her time at Hogwarts she had hated him. Yes, deep down she knew that he had a lot to make up for. But maybe she did too.

Lily pulled away from James and looked him in the eye. His cheeks were flushed and he met her gaze, eyes twinkling. 'James, I'm sorry.' Lily confessed.

'What for?' he raised his eyebrows.

'You're an arse, James Potter, but I should've thanked you that day in the broom cupboard. Bellatrix is a nasty bitch – you might've even saved my life.'

'It's nothing, Evans,' he grinned 'I like a fight.'

'But what you did was really good!'

'I was just fucking about.'

'No.' she admonished sharply. 'James I don't get you.'

'What's not to get?' he replied coolly.

'You act like you're so open and cool with everything, but you close up the minute anything gets too serious! I just want to talk-'

'I'll go and get us a couple of drinks.' James stood up abruptly, allowing Lily to slide off his lap. Before she could say anything, he disappeared.

Lily sighed in frustration, wondering why it was so impossible for James to open up. She contemplated going to find him but, before she could stand up, someone flopped onto the sofa next to her.

'Alright Lils?' Sirius asked. 'Where's old Prongs gone? You guys seemed to be getting pretty cosy a minute ago.'

'He just went off. We were talking and he just- oi don't call me Lils.'

'And why not?'

'Because that's what my friends call me!' she replied, exasperated.

'And we're not friends?' Sirius gasped sarcastically, clutching his heart in mock anguish.

'You've never been all that nice to me, Sirius.'

'Lily, I'm not all that nice to anyone. Don't take it personally. In fact, compared to some people, I treat you with the same love and respect I would a sister.'

'You don't have any sisters, do you Sirius.' Lily noted sceptically.

'Thank God.' He replied darkly.

Sensing that this was not something Sirius particularly wanted to talk about, Lily changed the subject. 'So what is it with James then? Is he incapable of human emotion?'

'Look, Lils,' said Sirius seriously, 'I know it seems like James has it all. He's rich, the girls love him, and he gets good grades. But he's got stuff too, alright, just like the rest of us.'

'What kind of _stuff_?'

'When he's ready, he'll tell you himself.' Sirius smiled. 'Let's just say that old Voldemort coming to power isn't really helping anyone right now.'

'You say the name.' Lily gasped.

'What – Voldemort?' Yeah, Evans, I say the name.' he chuckled and stood up. 'Anyway, I am sad to inform you that question time with Sirius the Wise Owl is officially over. Jenna Spinnet and I have some unfinished business.' He began to walk away but turned round once more. 'Just give James time, Lils, he bloody likes you.'

Lily blinked and Sirius was gone. She rubbed her temples; Sirius Black had a non-arsehole side to him and James Potter was actually deep. Next thing she knew, Remus Lupin was gonna start turning into a pygmy-puff on full moons.

* * *

James was staring absently at the drinks table before him, his mind a million miles away. He thought of Evans' big green eyes – the way they had begged him to listen as she tried to break through his barriers – and the way he had just shut her down. It wasn't that he particularly _wanted _to lie to Evans, he didn't really want to lie to anyone, but secrets bred secrets and James had a lot to hide.

How could he be totally honest with Evans when it wasn't even his own secrets he was keeping? James' parents, Remus, Dumbledore – they all had something they needed him to hide.

Few people (and by 'few' James meant just the Marauders) knew about James' home life. When James was at school, his parents' home doubled up as the headquarters of an organisation known by its members as the Order of the Phoenix. The Order was headed by Dumbledore himself; they were an elite group of witches and wizards chosen by the headmaster to try and put an end to the ever-growing power of Lord Voldemort.

It had become apparent very early on that the Ministry of Magic were completely unprepared for the growing darkness that was sweeping the Wizarding World. A new Minister for Magic, Cornelius Fudge, had recently been appointed and his strategy seemed fairly simple – to try and convince everyone that the evil unfurling before them was just a figment of their imagination.

James usually kept out of the Order's business (mainly due to the fact that his parents would not hear of him joining until he was at least 17) but he had heard enough to understand that the world was growing more dangerous every day. Secrets bred secrets and the Ministry and Order alike were full of them.

James had of course been sworn to secrecy by everyone from his parents to Dumbledore himself; it was apparent that, should anyone find out about the Order, lives could be lost. Despite the obvious danger, James was eager to sign up to the fight. The idea of just sitting around while Lord Voldemort was gaining more power every day was sickening. Perhaps Evans was right, perhaps James did have a hero complex.

Speaking of Evans, she had apparently snuck up behind James while he was in his stupor. She tapped him on the shoulder and he turned round, fixing a grin onto his face.

'Y'alright, Evans? I wasn't sure if you wanted some more firewhisky or if you'd rather stick to butterbeer from now on.'

James watched as Evans battled with herself for a moment; to his immense relief she seemed to decide that now was not the time for asking questions. 'I think I can handle the firewhisky.' She replied stubbornly.

'Are you sure? I'm really not feeling cleaning up your alcohol-induced vomit.'

'I can keep my alcohol down just fine, Potter,' she quipped, pouring herself a generous glass, 'let's see if you can keep up!'

James studied Evans discreetly as she swayed gently to the music, cup in hand. She was still wearing her little cheerleading outfit, James noticed. He also couldn't help noticing she had a pretty hot body; she was curvy, her large hips petering into a small waist, and then out again to her chest. She was really very pretty, perhaps not a stunning vela-esque beauty, but nice to look at all the same.

There was something about Evans that made James feel like he was coming home. Maybe that was why he liked her so much.

'Go to the Yule Ball with me.' He proposed suddenly.

'W-what?' Evans replied startled.

'Go to the Yule Ball with me.'

'I- You want me to-? But… Listen here, Potter, just because we bloody kissed once-'

'Three times.' James interjected.

'Whatever.' She carried on, scowling at him. 'Just because we kissed _three times _doesn't give you the right to start ordering me around. I don't _need _you to take me to the Ball – I am perfectly capable of going alone. I'm not gonna start a relationship with anyone who's gonna be telling me what to do and-'

'So that's a yes then?' James grinned.

'Well you don't need to look so bloody smug about it, do you?'

James grinned and grabbed Evans by the waist, drawing her to him. He leaned down and whispered in her ear. 'I like hearing you talk about starting a relationship.'

She smacked his chest indignantly but James could feel her smile where her lips touched his kneck.

* * *

Suddenly the door of the Gryffindor common room burst open. The music and chatter quickly died down at the sight of Professor McGonagall looking pale and livid in the threshold.

The Professor's hands were shaking, Lily noted, as she quickly crossed the room to stand in the centre.

'Marlene McKinnon and James Potter?' she called. 'Where are Marlene McKinnon and James Potter?'

'Here, Professor.' Marlene called across the room. James simply raised his hand.

'This party is over. Everyone to their dormitories immediately!' McGonagall ordered.

No-one moved for a moment. 'Please don't cancel the party, Professor!' Emily Bell called. 'We can be quieter.'

'This isn't a noise complaint, Miss Bell,' McGonagall replied sharply, 'there was been an attack. Everyone please go to their dormitories – NOW!'

The crowd dispersed quickly, everyone heading up the various staircases to their respective sleeping quarters.

McGonagall swept over to where James and Lily were still standing, Marlene following closely behind.

'Potter,' she began, looking uncharacteristically frantic, 'I'm afraid you and Miss McKinnon must come with me _right now._'

'Is everything okay?' James blurted, his arm slipping from Lily's waist. 'My parents, the Order-'

'I will explain everything shortly,' McGonagall cut across sharply, 'but not here and not now. Come along.'

James looked at Lily. Slowly she nodded, communicating that she could be okay, that he should go. Without another word, he swept after McGonagall without looking back.

Lily watched him go. The 'attack' presumably had something to do with He-Who-Must-Not – _Voldemort_, but why was that a call for James to leave? And what exactly was 'the Order'?

Sighing, Lily made her way up the staircase to her dormitory hoping that, whatever had happened, James and Marlene would be okay.


	10. Revelations

****A/N** Hey Guys, I'm sooo sorry, this chapter has taken ages, I'm an arsehole! My laptop broke and I lost all the progress I made on the story so far so I had to start all over again! Anyway, I hope you like this Chapter, just a heads up, the real action gets going from now**

* * *

Chapter 10 – Revelations

No-one spoke as McGonagall led James and Marlene through the deserted corridor. It was late enough that night had fallen blackly and, as they passed an open window, James could see the moon hanging bright and round in the sky. Almost full. The air was cold and crisp; it had an electric bite to it.

James knew there was only one reason that McGonagall would pull him and Marlene away from their friends at such an hour – something had happened to the Order.

It was only when they rounded a corner into a familiar hallway that James realised they were headed to Dumbledore's office.

As they ascended the spiral staircase to where the headmaster lived, James became aware that McGonagall was breathing rather heavily. Tendrils of shiny, black hair fell from her usually immaculate bun and with a jolt James realised there was blood on the sleeve of her robes.

'Professor-', he began questioningly, but she cut him off.

'It's not mine, Potter.' she said shortly. James didn't question her further.

The door to Dumbledore's office flew open, revealing the old headmaster standing in the threshold. However, right now he didn't look old. There was a fire in his usually serene, twinkling eyes – a fire that James had never encountered before.

Dumbledore stepped aside wordlessly, allowing James and Marlene to slip past him into the office. The room looked largely the same as last the time James had been there, spindly silver contraptions still lined the walls, whirring and puffing. The phoenix still sat watchfully on its perch.

There was only one difference.

A group of about 10 witches and wizards were crowded around Dumbledore's desk looking grave. James recognised a few of them; small, bald headed Dorcas Meadowes was twisting his wizard's hat nervously in his hands, looking remarkably ordinary next to the midnight-robed figure of Kingsley Shacklebolt. Behind the two of them stood Alastor Moody – a famous auror renowned for his rather unconventional methods. Towering over the whole group was none other than the assistant Hogwarts gamekeeper, Rubeus Hagrid. James knew these people because he'd seen many of them numerous times before; they had all been at his house at one time or another. It was the Order.

At the sight of Marlene, a grey haired woman detached herself from the group, raced over, and flung her arms around the girl. She clung on wordlessly, heaving silent tears.

'M-mum?' Marlene questioned uncertainly, patting the woman's head. 'Mum, what's wrong?'

James was reminded sharply that Marlene really knew nothing about the Order. He remembered his own mother telling him that Demetria and Mark McKinnon had wanted to keep their daughter out of the conflict for as long as possible. He pitied Marlene but couldn't exactly blame her parents for their secrecy – he could do without the anxious knot in his stomach that twisted every time there was another attack.

The woman, Demetria McKinnon, just drew away wordlessly and shook her head. She would have looked composed had it not been for the tears still streaming freely down her face.

It was Dumbledore who spoke.

'There has been an attack,' he began gravely, speaking only to James and Marlene, 'on the Ministry of Magic itself. At 9pm this evening a group of Death Eaters, presumably working under the instructions of Lord Voldemort, attacked the muggle Houses of Parliament in London. The attack was small, few muggles were hurt and the Ministry quickly dispatched a group of aurors to clear up the damage and modify memories where necessary.

Unfortunately, it became clear that this attack was nothing more than a diversion.

With the Ministry lacking much of its usual defence, a much larger armada of Death Eaters descended upon them.'

Dumbledore paused for a moment, seemingly almost unable to go on. He cleared his throat.

'It was carnage. The Order arrived in time to prevent total devastation, but we lost many tonight. Adrian Weasley, Dianne Bones and-' he turned to Marlene, 'Mark McKinnon are among those who died.'

Marlene let out a wordless wail and crumpled to the floor clutching her head in her hands. Her mother knelt next to her and threw her arms around her daughter.

Their joint grief was too much to watch. James turned away.

Suddenly, a thought occurred to him. Sweeping his eyes over the battle-worn crowd in front of him, James searched for two people. He could not locate the bespectacled face of his mother or the bald head of his father. Breathing in a shuddering gasp, James felt his stomach drop. Wordlessly he turned to Dumbledore, who was watching him. There was a pain in the old headmaster's eyes that seemed to mirror even that of Marlene and her mother.

'My parents,' James tried to say, but felt his throat close up as he tried to speak.

Dumbledore seemed to understand. 'James, your parents were some of the first on the scene at the Ministry. They fought incredibly bravely but, alas, we were just too unprepared for the attack. It is the belief of the Order that Dorea and Charlus have been taken captive by Lord Voldemort, and that he intends to use them to gain information about the ongoing fight against his forces.'

James felt sick. He felt more than sick, actually, he felt like the world around him was peeling and crumbling away before him. He thought of his mother and her kindness towards Remus, then his father and his love for muggle fiction. They had told him enough about Voldemort for James to understand what was going to happen to them.

'He'll torture them.' James breathed raggedly.

'Your parents are some of the most loyal people in the Order-' Dumbledore began, but James interrupted him.

'WELL THAT'S WORSE!' he yelled. 'That's so much worse because if they don't help him he'll kill them! He'll murder my parents!'

'James, I know-'

'No, you don't know! How could you possibly know anything?'

James knew he was being rude and disrespectful; honestly he was surprised he hadn't lost 100 points from Gryffindor already. But he didn't care. All he cared about was the look on Marlene's face when Dumbledore had told her about her father. All he cared about was the idea of his parents locked away somewhere, or being tortured by Voldemort. All he cared about was the anger inside him – the urge to tear and kill and _hurt _someone.

He felt his knees give way and thought he was going to fall to the floor; however, before he could crumple, a pair of strong arms grabbed him by his shoulders. James looked up. Professor McGonagall drew him to his feet and wordlessly enveloped him into a hug. Her strong arms felt almost like his mother's and, just for a moment, he allowed himself to be held by someone who wanted him to be safe.

James quickly drew away, steeling himself. He turned away from the members of the Order, all looking at him and Marlene with pity etched into their faces and spoke only to Dumbledore. 'So what are we going to do? How are we going to get my parents back?'

'The rest of the Order is making arrangements as we speak.'

'Good, when do we leave?'

'You aren't coming with us, James,' said Dumbledore sombrely.

'The Hell I'm not, that's my parents!' James retorted angrily.

To James' surprise, Dumbledore smiled. 'You're not coming with us, James, because we are not going tonight. The Order is too badly weakened, too many of us are injured or missing, and frankly we do not have the first idea where your parents could be.'

Despite himself, James knew that Dumbledore was being reasonable. He couldn't expect the rest of the Order, already broken and battle worn, to risk their lives again tonight in order to go on a hopeless suicide mission. Still, he couldn't just sit around doing nothing.

'So what am I going to do then?' he asked through gritted teeth.

'Right now you are going to go back to your common room. You are going to go to sleep and in the morning you will attend lessons as usual – I believe your first lesson is Transfiguration.'

James opened his mouth incredulously, about to argue that he couldn't just _sit around _and do nothing while his parents were missing, but Dumbledore cut across him. 'In due course when and only _when, _I have made the necessary arrangements, we shall speak again James. And then I shall answer all your questions, and you will get what you desire.'

James was about to say that the only thing he desired was his parents back, but something stopped him. He wanted his parents to get home safely, but that wasn't the _only _thing he wanted. The anger boiling through his veins like lava had not abated one bit and James could only think of one word: 'revenge'. Slowly, very slowly, he nodded.

'Excellent,' Dumbledore said levelly, 'now James, I really must ask you to leave – students should not be roaming the halls at this hour.'

Casting one last look over at Marlene, who had not moved or even acknowledged where she was for the entirety of the conversation, James headed towards the door. However, before he opened it, Dumbledore called from behind him: 'Oh, and James, it would not be wise for you to share what you have learned here tonight. By doing so, you would only serve to put others in unnecessary danger.'

James paused for a moment but said nothing, as he threw the door open and exited the room. This response seemed to be enough for Dumbledore, however, as he did not call after him again.

* * *

Lily felt herself jolted awake at the sound of the Fat Lady's portrait being banged open. She had snuck back downstairs to the common room after McGonagall had left, in order to wait for James and Marlene's return. However, it seemed that she had fallen asleep while waiting, as she now awoke feeling alarmed and disorientated.

She quickly stood up and shook herself off, reigniting the lamps in the common room with a flick of her wand. With relief, Lily saw that James had returned but, much to her confusion, Marlene was not with him.

James was red in the face; his hair was unruly, as if he had been constantly running his hands through it, and, if she didn't know him better, Lily would have sworn there were tears in his eyes. Stepping around her chair, Lily moved towards him.

'James?' she asked tentatively, reaching out to him. Lily had gotten so used to being able to casually touch him, she supposed, that it came as rather a shock to her when he shied away from her hand like it was poison.

James made no answer for a moment, just stared at her like he had never seen her before in his life.

'What are you doing up so late?' he asked finally, not looking her in the eye.

'I was- I was waiting for you.' She replied, suddenly feeling rather pathetic.

'Why?' he demanded.

'I dunno- I guess I was worried… McGonagall looked pretty shaken up when she came in and there was something about an attack…' she trailed off.

* * *

James' chest hurt. He looked at Evans, with her unruly bed hair and bright green eyes. She was worrying at her lip with her teeth again, and clutching her arms around her body because the common room was always bloody freezing at night. James wanted nothing more than to go to her, he realised with shock, to have her hold him in those arms and tell him that everything was going to be okay.

Evans was small and warm, and she always smelled like freshly baked bread and coffee. She was funny and comfortable. She was _coming home_. James wanted home right now – _needed _it – but Dumbledore's words kept spinning around his mind: _'…you would serve to put others in unnecessary danger.'_

'You don't need to worry about me, Evans, I'm fine.' He said shortly, hating himself for the look of hurt that flashed across her face.

'James, has something happened?' she tried again.

'Nothing's happened. Can I go to bed now or d'you have something else to say?'

'I- no…'

'Good.'

James swept past her, unable to look at her face. She had just been warming up to him, he knew, after years of hating him, Evans had finally been starting to see that he wasn't just a nasty git. And he knew now that he'd probably blown it. If she ever spoke to him again, it would probably be to tell him to go fuck himself.

All he wanted to do was go back and apologise, to tell her everything, but to do that would be to put her in danger and that wasn't an option. So James kept on walking up the stairs. He collapsed on his bed, ignoring Sirius when he tried to ask if James was alright; ignoring everything except the pounding in his head and the twist of his gut.

Somewhere out there, his parents were yelling his name.


	11. Repercussions

Chapter 11 - Repercussions

James looked in the mirror. He was pale with dark blackish rings under his eyes. His hair was even more unruly than usual. He kind of looked like death.

He had not been able to sleep all night; tossing and turning, James had envisaged his parents in various situations – sometimes being tortured by Voldemort or his Death Eaters, sometimes dead at the bottom of a lake.

They couldn't be dead, James decided; he would be able to feel it, he'd _know _if that had happened. All he felt now was anger. Deep and cold.

Dressing quickly, James made his way out of the dormitory, hoping for some time alone. Hurriedly making his way along the fourth-floor corridor, he came up short at the sight of Severus Snape emerging from the Library, clutching a pile of dingy-looking books. James felt his lip curl. Generally he just ignored Snape these days; with a lot of furious persuasion from Evans, he had come to realise that picking on the Slytherin boy was generally just a stupid thing to do. However, James wasn't really in the mood to ponder the moral nature of his decisions today.

'Oi, Snivelly!' James called out menacingly. 'What you got there?'

Snape turned around slowly, already drawing his wand out of his robes with one hand; the books remained in the other. 'What do _you _want Potter?' he replied toughly (or as toughly as a weedy little bag of shit could).

'I want to know what you've got there.' James advanced closer, pulling out his own wand. He came face to face with Snape.

'That's none of your business.'

'Ooh none of my business? What are you, a first year? Let me see the bloody books!' James knew he was asking for a fight. He was being irrational. Stupid. But he didn't care.

Lurching forward, James smacked the pile of books from Snape's arms, sending them cascading to the floor. He leaned forward to check out one of the titles: _1000 Ways to Torture Using Magic. _It had 'RESTRICTED SECTION' stamped over the cover in bright red ink, but that could not entirely cover up the image on the cover of a person writhing in what seemed to be unbearable agony.

James felt cold.

'What the fuck is this?' he demanded, picking up the book and jamming it in Snape's face.

'Just a bit of light reading,' Snape sneered.

'Going to give it to your little Death Eater friends, I suppose?'

Something seemed to flicker in Snape's eyes for a moment. _'He knows,' _James realised suddenly, _'he knows about my parents.'_

'You little shit,' James breathed.

Snape's mouth curled into a sneer. 'I don't know what you're talking about, Potter.'

'YOU FILTHY LIAR!' James exploded suddenly. 'I guess you've taken the mark now then? Become a _proper _member of the club!'

Wordlessly, Snape slid the sleeve of his robes up to reveal… nothing. His pale, translucent skin was unmarked except for the delicate blue veins visible underneath.

James swallowed. 'Well it's only a matter of time I suppose.'

For a moment Snape said nothing, just eyed James with a look of calculating superiority. Just when James thought that he was not going to reply at all, he chuckled slightly. 'Yes, yes I suppose it is, Potter. I mean, I already know enough to have heard about _poor _mummy and daddy Potter. Merlin knows I hope they'll be alright.' His voice dripped with sarcasm.

James didn't bother with a reply. Pointing his wand at Snape, he yelled '_Confringo!' _

However, Snape was too fast; dropping to the floor he easily avoided James' hex, which instead hit the wall, causing a huge explosion of rubble. Up on his feet a moment later, he had already begun his counter-curse: '_Cruci-'_

The spell was cut short by James barrelling into him head first, sending both the boys crashing to the floor. Pinning Snape to the ground by the neck with one hand, James used the other to clumsily hit him around the face. Though good with magic, Severus was particularly weak for a 16 year old boy; he seemed unable to wrench James' hand free, and so was stuck, his face slowly turning purple.

James faltered for a moment. Hitting Snape had not brought him the relief he had imagined. On the contrary, he felt rather deflated watching the other boy struggle to breathe. He loosened his grip unsurely.

Unfortunately, Snape seemed to take this as a sign of weakness. Grappling at his side, he grabbed a handful of dust, and one of the chunks of cement that had come loose due to James' Blasting Curse. Flailing his arm wildly, Snape managed to catch James' forehead, causing the other boy to topple to the floor. Blinded momentarily by pain that seared across his eyes and head, James could do little but clutch at his face.

'Fighting like a muggle are we, Potter?' Snape hissed venomously. 'You're a traitor to your own kind. You might as well be a filthy little mudblood!'

James swung his arm out wildly and again caught Snape in the face, this time his jaw. Forcing himself upright, he dragged Snape into a standing position and pushed him against the wall, feeling a surge of pleasure at the crunch that the back of his head made against the bricks. He drew his arm back, about to send it smashing into Snape's nose when something huge and black barrelled into him, knocking him sideways.

Sunlight trickled through the curtains of the four-poster bed, alarmingly bright, signifying that it was probably a bit too late in the day for Lily to still be curled up under the covers. Still, she kept her eyes shut, refusing to allow herself to be awoken just yet. _'Just a few more minutes,' _she thought desperately, already feeling the thumping of a looming hangover at her temples.

Last night had been an unmitigated disaster, Lily decided. First she had snogged James Potter _numerous times _in front of the entire school and then, hours later, he had blown her off altogether – seeming to want to show very clearly that he was absolutely not interested. Lily had been left feeling like a fool in the wake of James' sudden change of heart.

And then there was Marlene… _Marlene!_

Sitting bolt upright and whipping back the curtains, Lily was met with rather a surprising sight. Marlene's bed was empty and perfectly made, curtains neatly drawn back – not even a loose sock in sight. Lily tried to remember the last time that Marlene had actually made her bed, or even got up before midday on a Saturday. She came up short. Had Marlene even returned to the common room last night? And if not where was she now?

Figuring that she was unlikely to get any more sleep now, Lily decided to get dressed and make her was down to the Great Hall. Perhaps she would find that Marlene was already downstairs, laughing away as she usually was without a care in the world. And James… well James could do whatever he wanted. It wasn't like it was Lily's business anyway, they weren't _married_. They weren't even in a relationship.

However, Lily could not seem to sweep the little pang of worry from her gut as she searched for a clean pair of robes.

James landed in a crumpled heap on the floor, gasping as the air was knocked out of his lungs. Attempting to push the large black _somebody_ off him, James lurched vaguely in the direction of Snape once more. However, the person caught him in a backwards bear hug, pinning his arms to his sides. Try as he might, James could not remove himself from the vice-like grip. As he reoriented himself, James realised who it was that was preventing him from launching himself at Snape once more.

'Calm down, mate.' Sirius panted. 'Don't do something you'll regret.'

'Let go of me!' James grunted furiously.

Sirius just shook his head grimly. Looking up, James saw Peter standing in front of Snape, pushing him backwards. Remus was positioned between the two groups, his arms outstretched, and a look of cold fury on his face.

'Get out of here!' he hissed at Snape shortly.

Apparently losing his nerve at the sight of James' friends, Snape quickly gathered up his books and made his exit. Only when he had disappeared round the corner did Sirius release his grip on James.

'What was that?' Sirius asked desperately.

James could feel blood trickling from above his eye where Snape's rock had hit him. Pain radiated down his face. 'Nothing.' He replied shortly. Now that the raw anger of the fight was beginning to wear off, James felt empty. What had he been thinking? If he'd hit Snape as hard as he had wanted to… What was happening to him?

Remus rounded on him. 'That wasn't nothing!' he snapped frantically. 'You could've got in serious trouble for that James; not only that, you could have seriously hurt Snape!' There was a haggard, wolfish glint to Remus' usually serene eyes. James wondered vaguely when the next full moon was.

'James what's wrong?' Sirius asked gently, his eyes trained on his best mate's. 'Something happened last night, didn't it? That's why you're acting like this.'

'Prongs we're your best mates, you can talk to us.' Peter chimed in.

James shook his head. 'No I can't.' he replied hopelessly. 'Not about this.'

Sirius seemed somewhat lost for words. Remus was leaning against the wall, panting slightly. James knew that if he told Sirius, Remus and Peter what was bothering him, they'd want to help. Hell, they'd probably want to grab a set of brooms right now and go on a search party, even if it meant facing Voldemort alone. But that was the whole problem, no matter how much James wanted to find his family again, he wasn't going to let his friends be put in danger – even if that meant going out all alone himself.

Turning away from the scene before him, James walked back down the corridor alone, feeling three sets of eyes on his back.

Lily sat alone at the Gryffindor table; almost everyone had already left by the time she got there, but she was sure that Marlene hadn't been in the Great Hall anyway. She picked moodily at her toast, not really feeling particularly hungry.

Suddenly the doors of the Great Hall burst open and in strode James. Lily was shocked to see that half of his face was covered in blood, the other half dirty and dust-stained. His robes, too, were covered in dust and one sleeve seemed to be ripped. Seemingly oblivious to the strange stares he was attracting, and with a thundery expression on his face, James moved towards the Gryffindor table but came up short at the sight of Lily. He recovered pretty quickly, however, plopping down on a seat as far away from her as possible.

Lily studied James' face for a moment. His jaw was clenched, eyes trained forward mechanically. He looked… tense, on edge. The fact that his friends weren't gathered around him was, too, a warning sign; the Marauders tended to travel in a pack. Blood was steadily coursing down one side of his face from a deep gash above his eye, but he barely seemed to notice. Glancing away from James and up to the teachers' table, Lily noticed Professor McGonagall (one of the only teachers who had not yet vacated her seat, although she did not appear to be eating) eyeing him with the same concerned expression Lily knew she wore on her own face. She appeared to be about to get up, undoubtedly meaning to sweep over and question James about the state of his face. Somehow Lily knew this was unlikely to make anything better.

Standing up quickly, Lily strode purposefully over to James (trying to ignore the twist of nerves in her stomach) and grabbed him by the scruff of his robes, pulling him upright. Wordlessly, she dragged him out of the Great Hall and into the deserted entrance hall.

James attempted to squirm out her grasp. 'Evans-'

Lily just shook her head firmly. Something in her face must have told him not to test her, because he followed quietly as she led him down the hallway. Indeed, all the fight seemed to have left him by the time Lily finally pulled him into the trophy room and shut the door behind her. He slumped to the floor in silence and placed his head in his hands.

Lily watched James as he clutched at his hair desperately before visibly pulling himself back together by force. He ran his hands across his face a few times and when his eyes finally came to rest on hers they were cold.

'You know if you wanted to find a place to have scandalous sex, Evans, I could've found somewhere much better.' The joke was cold; it was obviously intended to sting.

'Shut up, Potter.' Lily growled, drawing her wand from her robes.

'Why? Why should I shut up, Evans?'

'Because you're being unfair!' she replied, hating the fact she sounded like such a hurt child.

'Heads up, Evans, life_ is _unfair. Get over it.' James was evidently trying to sound tough and uncaring but his voice cracked a little, the fire wasn't really in his words. Lily wondered what he meant by that statement; how could life possibly be unfair for _James Potter_? She put the thought aside for a moment, now really wasn't the time.

Lily raised her wand and aimed it at James' face.

James stared blankly at Evans' wand, which was pointed right at him. He wondered whether she planned to hex him. He couldn't really blame her if she did. Closing his eyes, he tried to prepare himself for whatever Evans was about to throw his way; he just hoped it would make her feel better.

'_Episkey_!' Evans snapped.

James gasped as he felt a sharp pain in his forehead; for a moment he wondered whether Evans had taken out his eye. Then came a strange tingling sensation right where the throbbing cut from Snape's attack lay. Wonderingly, he reached up and felt his forehead; Evans' spell had knitted the flesh back together perfectly without any sign of the original mark (save for all the dried blood caking still caking his face). He looked up at her wordlessly.

'You should've gone to Madam Pomfrey for that.' She said softly.

'I didn't need the questions,' he replied.

Without answering, Evans swept over and sat facing him. Her eyes were soft and round and, as usual, she smelt really good. James looked away; he couldn't – wouldn't – bring himself to look at her for too long. Tentatively, Evans raised a hand and cupped his chin, guiding his eyes to hers once more. She did not remove her hand from his face, even when he met her gaze once more. James was acutely aware of how close their bodies were; the touch of her hand burned across his skin like wildfire.

James was surprised to find he had tears in his eyes, and wondered where they had sprung from. He prayed that Evans didn't notice; it really was quite dark in the trophy room. Even if she did notice, she didn't say anything at all. She simply leaned in silently and placed a sweet, warm kiss on his mouth, before standing up and leaving the room altogether.

James watched her go.

_'… __you would serve to put others in unnecessary danger.'_


End file.
